Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more natural and correct tense and word choice; avoid redundancy and limit to 3–4 concise sentences. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Correct verbs (went, swam) and simplify phrases.

예시: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. I often went there with my friends to play games like hide-and-seek and swim in the small pool. Because the park had many play areas and trees, it was a favourite place for us to spend afternoons.

제안: Fix grammar (use present simple: 'enjoy'), avoid fillers ('you know'), and combine sentences to be more coherent. Use linking words like 'because' or 'so' appropriately and be specific about activities and frequency.

예시: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks, especially after meals. There is a small park near my dormitory where people often take a stroll, so I usually meet and chat with neighbours there because it is peaceful and convenient.

제안: Make the answer concise and organized: give a clear reason and one or two specific benefits. Avoid awkward phrasing and repetitions; use linking words (because, so, therefore). Keep to 2–3 sentences maximum.

예시: Yes, I would. Because city life is very fast-paced, more parks would give people places to relax and recharge. For example, parks encourage walking and socialising, which benefits both mental and physical health.

제안: Be specific and fluent: correct awkward phrases ('seen in many films and TV shows'), avoid filler ('uh'), and combine sentences to show reason and detail. Mention a clear detail about seasons or an activity to enhance content.

예시: Yes, I'd love to visit Central Park in New York because I've seen it in many films and TV shows and it looks beautiful. I'm especially interested in how the scenery changes with the seasons, for example the colourful leaves around the lake in autumn.

× My friends and I often go there to play with other kids.

✓ My friends and I often went there to play with other kids.

The context is about childhood (past). The verb 'go' should be in the past tense 'went' to match the time frame. Use past tense consistently when describing habitual actions in the past.

× Yes, I still enjoying going to a park, specifically after meals.

✓ Yes, I still enjoy going to a park, specifically after meals.

After the auxiliary 'still' we need the base verb 'enjoy' (or 'am still enjoying' with a present continuous structure). 'Still enjoying' without an auxiliary is ungrammatical. Use 'still enjoy' for habitual present actions or 'am still enjoying' for ongoing action.

× For example, we use swim and play, hide and seek and a lot of other games also.

✓ For example, we played swimming and ball games, hide-and-seek, and many other games.

Prepositions and verb forms are incorrect. In past context, use past verbs 'played'. 'Swim' as a noun should be 'swimming' or 'swimming games'; listing games needs parallel structure and commas. 'Also' placement was awkward; rephrase for clarity.

× I still enjoy going to a park, specifically after meals.

✓ I still enjoy going to the park, specifically after meals.

When referring to a specific park near the speaker (mentioned later), use the definite article 'the park' rather than the indefinite 'a park'. If speaking about any park generally, 'a park' could be acceptable, but context indicates a particular nearby park.

× So there is a relatively small park near my dormitory where people often, you know, take a stroll there.

✓ There is a relatively small park near my dormitory where people often, you know, take a stroll.

Avoid repeating location phrases: 'there' at the start and 'there' at the end is redundant. Remove the final 'there' to form a correct relative clause. The sentence begins correctly with 'There is' to indicate existence.

× So I usually chat with some people there and it's so nice.

✓ So I usually chat with some people there and it's very nice.

'Usually chat' is fine in present tense for habitual action. 'So nice' is informal; 'very nice' is more grammatical. This is a minor style change rather than a strict grammar error.

× Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because I think the living pace of modern people is extremely fast so people, urban people urge eagerly need more recreational space to relax and recharge and the park also benefits both mental and physical health and which encourage.

✓ Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because the pace of modern life is extremely fast, so urban people urgently need more recreational spaces to relax and recharge. Parks also benefit both mental and physical health and encourage community activities.

The original sentence is run-on and ungrammatical: mixed phrases like 'people, urban people urge eagerly need' are incorrect. Correct by splitting into sentences, using proper noun phrases ('the pace of modern life'), adverbs in correct position ('urgently need'), plural 'spaces', and clarifying the final clause ('Parks also benefit... and encourage...'). This improves clarity and grammatical structure.

× Yes, I would like to visit Central Park in New York City because I've seen in many fields and TV shows.

✓ Yes, I would like to visit Central Park in New York City because I've seen it in many films and TV shows.

The verb 'seen' requires an object ('it' referring to Central Park). 'Fields' is incorrect; use 'films' or 'movies'. Also include the pronoun 'it' after 'seen'.

× What appeals to me most is how the scenery change with seasons.

✓ What appeals to me most is how the scenery changes with the seasons.

Subject 'the scenery' is singular, so the verb should be 'changes' (third person singular). Also use 'with the seasons' for natural collocation; include 'the' before 'seasons'.

× Specifically in autumn, the lake turns, uh, colors.

✓ Specifically in autumn, the lake turns beautiful colors.

'Turns colors' is incomplete and informal; add an adjective to describe the colors ('beautiful colors' or 'various colors') or say 'the leaves change color' for clarity. This fixes the verb phrase and completes the idea.