Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more grammatically accurate and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence in past tense, avoid repetition, and add one specific detail to support your idea. Use linking words to connect ideas (for example, 'because' or 'so').

예시: Yes, I did. As a child I often went to the local park with my parents and brother because it helped me relax and be active. For example, we used to play football there every weekend, which improved my fitness and gave us time to bond.

제안: Use consistent tense (present for current habits), avoid informal labels, and keep sentences clear and short. Use a linking word to show purpose (e.g., 'to') and provide one specific routine detail (time or frequency).

예시: Yes, I do. I enjoy walking in parks to stay fit, and I usually go there in the mornings to reach my daily step goal. For instance, I walk 45 minutes with my mother three times a week.

제안: Be direct and avoid filler words ('uh', 'yeah'). Make opinions concise, correct grammar (plural/singular), and support your view with a brief specific reason and a suggestion. Use linking words like 'because' and 'therefore'.

예시: Yes, I would. Although there are many parks in my hometown, they are often overcrowded, so I think the city should build more small parks in residential areas to reduce crowding and give families easier access to green space.

제안: Remove hesitations and correct grammar ('visit to' → 'visit'; 'is in my bucket list' → 'is on my bucket list'). Be concise and give one clear reason with a specific example of what you want to see or do there.

예시: Yes, I would love to visit Disneyland — it is on my bucket list. I am especially excited to see the parades and meet the Disney Princess characters because I have loved them since childhood.

× Yes, when I was a child, I like to go park with my family and with my parents as well because it gives me relaxation and whenever I have to spend some quality time with my brother, I always visited to a park with him and it also keeps my body healthy.

✓ Yes, when I was a child, I liked to go to parks with my family because it relaxed me, and whenever I wanted to spend quality time with my brother, I always visited a park with him; it also kept me healthy.

Mixed present and past tense: 'when I was a child' sets past context so verbs should be past tense (liked, wanted, visited, kept). Also preposition and article corrections: 'go park' -> 'go to parks', 'visited to a park' -> 'visited a park'. Use plural 'parks' when speaking generally and keep consistent past tense to match the time reference.

× Yes, as I mentioned before that I am fitness freak. I like to keep myself healthy so whenever I get leisure time to complete my steps per day, I visited to a park and have a long walk there with my family.

✓ Yes, as I mentioned before, I am a fitness freak. I like to keep myself healthy, so whenever I have leisure time to complete my steps for the day, I visit a park and take a long walk there with my family.

Tense and noun issues: maintain present tense for current habits (am, like, have, visit, take). Article needed: 'a fitness freak'. Preposition and wording: 'visited to a park' -> 'visit a park'; 'have a long walk' -> 'take a long walk'; 'steps per day' -> 'steps for the day' or 'daily steps'.

× Most of the time I visited there with my mother.

✓ Most of the time I visit there with my mother.

Habitual action in the present: use simple present 'visit' rather than past 'visited'. Also remove unnecessary 'there' after 'visit' when destination already implied.

× In my hometown, there are plenty of parks you can visit and have some, uh, quality time with your family.

✓ In my hometown, there are plenty of parks where you can spend quality time with your family.

Word choice and structure: 'have some quality time' is informal; 'spend quality time' is the correct collocation. Added 'where' to link parks and the activity. Kept present tense to describe general fact.

× Yeah, I like to have some more parks in my city because, uh, most of the park are very packed with too much people in my hometown.

✓ Yeah, I would like to have more parks in my city because most of the parks are very crowded with too many people in my hometown.

Subject-verb agreement and word choice: 'park' -> 'parks' to match 'most of the'; verb 'are' must agree with plural 'parks'. 'Packed with too much people' is ungrammatical: use 'crowded' and 'too many people' for countable nouns. 'I like to have' better as 'I would like to have' for politeness.

× So I requested the government to install some more parks.

✓ So I would request the government to build some more parks.

Verb form and modality: 'requested' is past and suggests action completed; use 'would request' or 'would like to request' to express a present desire. 'Install' is not the best collocation for parks; use 'build' or 'provide'. Maintains conditional/polite tone.

× Yes, uh, I would love to visit to the Disneyland.

✓ Yes, I would love to visit Disneyland.

Preposition error combined with modal: 'visit to the Disneyland' should be 'visit Disneyland' (no 'to' after 'visit'). Also article 'the' is unnecessary for Disneyland as a proper noun.

× It is also a kind of park.

✓ It is also a kind of park.

This sentence is acceptable but slightly awkward; 'a kind of park' is grammatical. No change required by provided problem types, kept for clarity.

× It is my in my bucket list that I want to visit there.

✓ It is in my bucket list that I want to visit it.

Word order and pronoun use: remove duplicate 'my'. Better phrasing is 'It is on my bucket list' or 'Visiting it is on my bucket list.' Use 'on' with 'bucket list' and place pronoun 'it' correctly. Maintain present tense for a current desire.

× The one thing that fascinates me about the Disneyland is the Disney Princess.

✓ One thing that fascinates me about Disneyland is the Disney Princesses.

Article and number: drop 'the' before Disneyland and use plural 'Princesses' because referring to multiple characters. Also 'the' before 'Disneyland' is unnecessary for proper noun.

× I love them from I am very fond of them since my childhood.

✓ I have loved them; I have been very fond of them since my childhood.

Tense: use present perfect ('have loved', 'have been') with 'since my childhood' to show a state continuing from past to present. Original mixes present and incorrect word order. Also separate into two clearer clauses.

× So I want to visit there.

✓ So I want to visit there.

This sentence is grammatically acceptable; however, 'visit there' is less natural than 'visit it' or 'go there'. To be more natural: 'So I want to go there.' No mandatory correction under listed types, but suggestion provided.