Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Keep your response natural and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition (e.g. 'fed the birds, fed the cats'), and correct minor grammar (use 'the park' or 'parks'). Add one specific detail and use a linking word to make it coherent.

예시: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child, especially with my younger brother. We often played games with other kids and fed birds and cats, and sometimes climbed trees, which made those afternoons very memorable.

제안: Good structure and clarity. Shorten redundant phrases (e.g. 'feed the birds and stray cats') and replace informal words like 'random' with 'strangers'. Use a linking word to contrast past and present (e.g. 'however') and correct plural/singular ('trees').

예시: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks; however, I no longer play with other children or climb trees. Nowadays I usually sit under the shade of a tree and read, which helps me relax and use my free time well.

제안: Clarify and correct vocabulary and grammar. Give specific reasons using correct collocations (e.g. 'improve air quality', 'attract wildlife', 'promote physical activity'). Avoid unclear phrases like 'meet the emu present' and 'promote active income'. Use linking words ('because', 'for example') and keep to 2–3 sentences.

예시: Yes, I would like more parks because green spaces improve air quality and attract wildlife, such as birds and butterflies. For example, new parks would give people places to exercise or relax, which can reduce stress and encourage physical activity.

제안: Avoid filler words like 'Umm' and correct grammar ('a park near my village in the city' or 'a nearby park'). Be specific and concise: state the park name or location, one or two details (e.g. 'around a hundred types of flowers', 'free-roaming birds'), and use linking words if needed.

예시: I don't know many parks, but there is a nearby park I want to visit in my village area; I heard it has nearly a hundred types of flowers and many free-roaming birds, which sounds lovely.

× We went to park, played with other children and we fed the birds, fed the cats and even climbed the trees.

✓ We went to the park, played with other children, fed the birds, fed the cats, and even climbed trees.

The noun 'park' needs the definite article 'the' here (see Article errors) and 'trees' plural is fine; removing 'the' before 'trees' makes it natural. Also use commas and conjunctions correctly. Suggestion: include articles where referring to a specific place and avoid unnecessary 'the' before plural general nouns.'

× Yes, I still enjoy going to parks, although I don't play with random children, feed the birds and stray cats, or climb trees.

✓ Yes, I still enjoy going to parks, although I don't play with random children, feed the birds or stray cats, or climb trees.

Parallel structure prefers 'or' between the last two verbs/objects in the negative list to show alternatives. This sentence mainly had punctuation/parallelism issues; ensure consistent conjunction use in lists.'

× But I still go there to sit in a calm environment under the shade of the tree and read books to spend my quality leisure time.

✓ But I still go there to sit in a calm environment under the shade of a tree and read books to spend my leisure time.

Use 'a tree' because you are referring to any tree, not a specific one. 'Quality leisure time' is wordy and unnatural; 'my leisure time' is clearer. Suggestion: use indefinite article for nonspecific singular nouns and avoid redundant modifiers.'

× Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because green spaces improve air quality and attracting flowers that meet the emu present.

✓ Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because green spaces improve air quality and attract flowers that meet the current needs of the environment.

After 'and' the verb must match the first verb form: 'improve' and 'attract' (base form) for parallelism. 'Attracting' was incorrect here. The phrase 'meet the emu present' is unclear; I corrected to 'meet the current needs of the environment.' Suggestion: keep verbs parallel and use clear expressions.'

× Also new park will give people places to exercise or relax which helps to reduce stress, promote active income.

✓ Also, a new park will give people places to exercise or relax, which helps reduce stress and promotes active lifestyles.

Use 'a new park' (indefinite article) when introducing something new. Add comma before 'which' for nonrestrictive clause. 'Promote active income' is incorrect; likely intended 'promote active lifestyles.' Ensure subject-verb agreement: 'which helps reduce stress and promotes active lifestyles.' Suggestion: add articles for new singular nouns and choose appropriate collocations.'

× Umm, I don't know much about parks but there's a park nearby or village in in the city and I have heard that it is a really nice park with almost hundred types of flowers in it and it has some birds left freely.

✓ Umm, I don't know much about parks, but there's a park nearby in the city or in a nearby village, and I have heard that it is a really nice park with almost a hundred types of flowers and some birds living there freely.

Fixed preposition order: 'in the city' or 'in a nearby village.' Added comma after 'parks' for clarity. 'Almost hundred' requires 'a' before 'hundred.' 'Left freely' is incorrect; use 'living there freely.' Suggestion: use correct prepositions for locations, include articles before 'hundred,' and use natural verbs for animals' presence.'