Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Improve grammar (use subject pronouns and correct tense), add a clear topic sentence and one specific supporting detail. Keep it concise (max 5 sentences) and avoid repetition.

예시: Yes. I enjoyed going to parks as a child because my brother and I played football there every weekend. We often spent the whole afternoon on the swings and feeding the ducks, which made those days special.

제안: Avoid repetition and correct verb forms. Start with a direct topic sentence, then give one or two specific reasons using linking words (for example, "because" or "so").

예시: Yes, I still enjoy visiting parks because they remind me of my childhood. For example, walking there with my brother brings back memories of our games and helps us relax together.

제안: Clarify ideas and use correct subject–verb agreement. Be specific about benefits (air quality, recreation) and avoid unclear references (e.g., "UMM bikes"). Use linking words like "because" and "for example."

예시: Yes, I would like more parks because green spaces improve air quality and provide places for exercise. For example, additional parks with bike-sharing stations would encourage people to cycle and reduce traffic pollution.

제안: Remove repetition and tighten grammar. Give a clear plan (when/how) and one specific reason why you want to visit, using linking words like "because" or "so."

예시: Yes. If I have time next year, I would like to visit a national park in the Philippines because the trails are well maintained and the air is very fresh. I am especially interested in seeing the native plants and wildlife there.

× Yes, when I was a child me and my brother always went to park to play and spend time together.

✓ Yes, when I was a child my brother and I always went to the park to play and spend time together.

Use subject pronouns in subject position: 'my brother and I' not 'me and my brother'. Include the definite article 'the' with 'park' when referring to a specific type of place: 'the park'. Also use natural word order 'my brother and I'. Suggestion: always use 'I' as part of the subject and include articles with singular countable nouns.' ,

× Yes because the memories bring back and I feel I feel the childhood memories and also I love to play with my brother just like when we are child.

✓ Yes, because the memories come back and I feel the childhood memories, and I also love to play with my brother just like when we were children.

Use simple present 'come back' rather than 'bring back' in this context. Avoid repeating 'I feel'. Use past plural 'were children' to match plural subject and past reference. 'Child' should be plural 'children' when referring to both of you. Suggestion: avoid repetition, choose correct verb forms and plural nouns for groups.' ,

× Yes, because of the green spaces that makes the environment clean and also it feels so spacious if there's UMM bikes in our city also it shows that it gives UMM good environment.

✓ Yes, because the green spaces that make the environment clean also make it feel spacious; if there are UMM bikes in our city, they would also help give UMM a better environment.

The plural subject 'green spaces' requires plural verb 'make' not 'makes'. Use 'feel' with 'it' to describe feeling spacious. 'There are' is the correct form for plural 'UMM bikes' not 'there's'. Use 'they' to refer back to bikes and include an article before 'good environment' or rephrase as 'a better environment'. Suggestion: ensure verbs agree with plural subjects and use 'there are' for plural existence.' ,

× Yes, if I do have time then I will go to National Park in the Philippines where where you can see a lot of people wandering and walking around because of the environment is clean and we do have they do have fresh air.

✓ Yes, if I have time then I will go to the National Park in the Philippines, where you can see many people wandering and walking around because the environment is clean and they have fresh air.

Do not use unnecessary 'do' in conditional: 'if I have time' is correct. Include the definite article 'the' with 'National Park' when referring to a specific park. Remove the duplicated 'where' and the redundant 'do' before 'have'. Use 'many people' rather than 'a lot of people' for more formal speech. Use 'because the environment is clean' (not 'because of the environment is clean') and refer to people with 'they' or 'people' rather than 'we' if speaking generally. Suggestion: simplify conditionals, avoid duplication, and correct article use and clause structure.' }]} }imulation=UTF-8