Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: 発音と文法の誤りを直し、短く明確なトピックセンテンスと1つか2つの具体例を加えてください。例えば時制（"when I was a child"）と名詞の所有（"my childhood"は不可）に注意し、不要な「あー」や繰り返しを減らす練習をしましょう。また“beautiful/peaceful/playground”など適切な語彙に置き換えて簡潔な理由を述べてください。

예시: Yes, I loved going to parks when I was a child because they were peaceful and full of trees. For example, my local park had a big playground where I played with friends every weekend.

제안: 文法（主語と動詞の一致）と流暢さを改善し、接続語を使って理由と具体例をつなげてください。冗長なフィラー（"uh"）を減らし、具体的な描写（例えば "well-maintained paths" や "flower beds"）を加えると良いです。1〜3文で完結に述べましょう。

예시: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks because they make me feel relaxed. For example, the park near my home has well-maintained paths and colorful flower beds where I like to walk.

제안: 論理的な理由と具体例を明確に述べる練習をしてください。文法（"parks are"、"make us feel good"）を正しく使い、接続詞（"because" の後に理由を続ける）で文をつなげます。例として健康やコミュニティ活動への利点を挙げると説得力が増します。

예시: Yes, I would like more parks in my city because they improve people's health and wellbeing. For example, community parks provide space for exercise and social events, which helps residents stay active and connected.

제안: 動詞の形（"want to go"）、単数・複数の一致（"has a lot of activities"）を修正し、具体的な活動を1つか2つ挙げて魅力を示してください。簡潔な理由と具体例を組み合わせ、フィラーを減らして流暢さを出しましょう。

예시: Yes, I would like to visit Big Park because it offers many fun activities. For example, Big Park has hiking trails and a large playground where families can spend the whole day.

× Yes, umm, I like going to the park when my child because uh, park is very uh, uh, Parsi Palm.

✓ Yes, I liked going to parks when I was a child because the parks were very pleasant.

The student used incorrect tense and nouns. 'when my child' should be 'when I was a child' (present tense mistake and incorrect pronoun phrase). 'park' as a general noun should be plural 'parks' or use 'the park' with an article; here plural works. 'Parsi Palm' appears to be incorrect word choice; replace with 'pleasant' or another adjective. Use past tense 'liked' to describe a past habit. Suggestions: use 'I liked going to parks when I was a child' or 'I liked going to the park when I was a child' depending on singular/plural intent.

× Yes, I still like going to the park now, uh, because park is makes me happy. Uh, for example, uh, park is very, uh, beautiful, uh, green.

✓ Yes, I still like going to the park now because the park makes me happy. For example, the park is very beautiful and green.

Errors: unnecessary auxiliary and incorrect verb form 'is makes' should be 'makes' (subject-verb agreement and verb form). Missing definite article before 'park' when referring to a specific park: use 'the park'. Repetitive fillers removed. Use 'and' to connect adjectives 'beautiful and green'. Suggestions: say 'the park makes me happy' and 'the park is very beautiful and green'.

× Yes, because UH parks is important for people. Uh, for example, uh park the park makes. Our. Feel good, uh, for this reason.

✓ Yes, because parks are important for people. For example, parks make us feel good for this reason.

Errors: 'parks is' is subject-verb agreement error; plural subject 'parks' requires 'are'. The fragment 'park the park makes. Our. Feel good' is ungrammatical; combine into 'parks make us feel good'. Use pronoun 'us' instead of 'our' in this context. Suggestions: construct complete sentences with correct plural verbs and pronouns: 'Parks are important... Parks make us feel good.'

× Yes, uh, I want to going to uh, Big Park because Big Park is very fun.

✓ Yes, I want to go to Big Park because Big Park is very fun.

Error: after 'want' use the base verb 'go', not the -ing form 'going' (verb + -ing mistake). Also use 'to go to' for movement to a place. Suggestions: use 'I want to go to...' and avoid filler sounds.

× For example, Big Park have uh, uh, a lot of uh activities.

✓ For example, Big Park has a lot of activities.

Error: 'Big Park have' is subject-verb agreement error; singular proper noun 'Big Park' requires 'has'. Remove fillers and unnecessary repetitions. Suggestions: use 'has' with singular nouns: 'Big Park has many activities.'