Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more direct with a clear topic sentence, avoid negative hedging ('I don't think') and reduce redundancy. Add one specific supporting detail and a linking word. Keep it within 3–4 concise sentences.

예시: No, I didn't often go to parks as a child because there weren't any near my home. Instead, I played street games and football with neighborhood friends every afternoon, which kept me active and social.

제안: Begin with a direct topic sentence and correct grammar (articles/plurals). Use one linking phrase to connect ideas and include a specific activity you enjoy to make the answer vivid.

예시: Yes, I enjoy going to parks now. There are several large, spacious parks near my house, and I often go there with friends to sit on benches and chat while enjoying the fresh air.

제안: Remove fillers ('uh'), avoid repetition, and make the reason concise and specific. Use a linking word to explain the benefit and limit to 2–3 sentences.

예시: Yes, I would like more parks in my city because they provide a quiet place to relax. For example, having a nearby park would help me de-stress after work and reflect on important decisions.

제안: Avoid repetition and be more confident in expression. Give a brief specific preference (features) rather than repeating uncertainty. Use a linking word for clarity.

예시: I don't have a particular park in mind, but I would prefer a small, clean park with well-kept paths and seating. That way I can enjoy a peaceful walk or read without crowds.

× But now I like to go parks with my friends and there are a lot of big and spacious park around the area that I live in, so I like to go there and sit and talk with my friends.

✓ But now I like to go to parks with my friends and there are a lot of big and spacious parks around the area where I live, so I like to go there and sit and talk with my friends.

Plural nouns must match context: 'go to parks' requires the preposition to plus plural 'parks'. 'a lot of' should be followed by plural 'parks' not singular 'park'. Also use 'where I live' instead of 'that I live in' for natural word order; include 'to' after 'go'. Improve fluidity by keeping plural agreement.

× I don't think I used to go to the park when I was a child.

✓ I don't think I used to go to parks when I was a child.

If no specific park is meant, use plural 'parks' rather than 'the park'. The original definite article 'the' implies a specific park; here the student means parks in general. Also 'used to' is correctly used for past habitual actions.

× There was no park around my house, so instead of that I used to play games with my friends.

✓ There were no parks around my house, so instead I used to play games with my friends.

When referring to 'no parks' (plural), 'were' is the correct form of 'there be'. Also 'instead of that' is awkward; 'instead' is more natural. Maintain plural form to match meaning.

× But now I like to go parks with my friends and there are a lot of big and spacious park around the area that I live in, so I like to go there and sit and talk with my friends.

✓ But now I like to go to parks with my friends and there are a lot of big and spacious parks in the area where I live, so I like to go there and sit and talk with my friends.

Use 'to' after 'go' ('go to parks') and 'in the area' is preferable to 'around the area'. Replace 'that I live in' with 'where I live' for smoother and more natural relative clause.

× Yes, uh, I would like to have more parks around my living area because uh, uh, due to the stressful, due to the stressful life, I think uh, uh, having a park near, near my house would be would give me a space to think about my life decisions.

✓ Yes, I would like to have more parks near where I live because, due to a stressful life, having a park near my house would give me space to think about my life decisions.

Remove filler 'uh' and duplicated phrases. Use 'near where I live' or 'near my house' instead of 'around my living area'. Use the article 'a' before 'stressful life'. Remove the duplicated 'would be' — correct modal construction is 'would give me'. Also drop the extra comma and repeated words for clarity.

× Are there any parks you want to go to in the future?

✓ Are there any parks you would like to go to in the future?

Change 'want to go to' to 'would like to go to' to match polite, hypothetical future reference in this conversational context. This improves register and clarity.

× Well there is no specific specific parts that I want to go in the future, but just small and clean park would be nice and I don't think I have a particular park in my mind to go right now.

✓ Well, there are no specific parks that I want to go to in the future, but just a small, clean park would be nice and I don't think I have a particular park in mind right now.

Use plural 'parks' with 'no specific', so 'there are'. Correct 'parts' to 'parks'. Add 'to' after 'go'. 'Just a small, clean park' requires the article 'a' and commas for adjective order. 'In my mind' is simplified to 'in mind'. Remove duplicate 'specific' and fix word order for natural English.