Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Improve clarity and grammar: start with a clear topic sentence, correct tense and word choice (e.g., 'going to parks' not 'bath'), and avoid redundancy. Keep within 3–4 sentences and add one specific detail (a memory or activity) using a linking word. Pronunciation and sentence structure need smoothing.

예시: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. I often played football with my friends and had picnics with my family on weekends, which was very relaxing and made me feel happy. Because of these memories, parks are an important part of my childhood.

제안: Be concise and grammatically correct: answer directly, use present simple for habits and explain the reason with linking words (e.g., 'but', 'because'). Replace incorrect words ('past','bath') with 'parks' and 'limited time'. Limit to 2–3 sentences and give a specific example of what prevents you going.

예시: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks, but I rarely have time because I need to study and attend extra classes. For example, I usually only visit a park once a month now due to my busy school schedule.

제안: Make reasoning clearer and correct grammar: state your position, then give specific benefits using linking words ('because', 'for example'). Correct noun/verb forms (e.g., 'parks are', 'citizens'). Avoid vague phrasing like 'more industrial area to see'; instead explain that the city is industrial and lacks green space.

예시: Yes, I would definitely like more parks in my city because they provide peaceful places to relax and exercise. For example, in our mainly industrial area, additional green spaces would encourage people to walk, jog, and spend time outdoors.

제안: Be specific and correct grammar: name the park and give concrete activities you will do using linking words ('because', 'so'). Use correct forms (e.g., 'it has', 'landscapes', 'games') and combine related ideas into 2–3 sentences. Mention timing clearly.

예시: I would like to visit a national park called Dragon Park because it has beautiful landscapes and many outdoor activities. For example, I plan to go hiking and take lots of photos during my holiday next year.

× Yeah, I like the going to bath when I was try because I could play with my friends and have picnic with my family on weekends.

✓ Yeah, I liked going to the park when I was a child because I could play with my friends and have picnics with my family on weekends.

The student mixes present and past tenses. The question asks about childhood, so past tense 'liked' is appropriate. 'the going to bath' is incorrect noun choice and article usage; use 'going to the park'. 'when I was try' is ungrammatical and should be 'when I was a child'. 'have picnic' needs plural 'picnics' to match repeated weekends. Suggest using consistent past tense and correct nouns/articles.

× They are very relaxing and also improve my well-being.

✓ They were very relaxing and also improved my well-being.

The sentence refers to past experiences, so past tense verbs 'were' and 'improved' should be used, not present. This fixes tense consistency and verb agreement with the past context.

× So I think that is on a part of memory.

✓ So I think that is a part of my memories.

The phrase 'on a part of memory' is unidiomatic. Use 'a part of my memories' or 'part of my memory' to convey the meaning. Also possessive 'my' clarifies whose memories. This corrects word order and preposition misuse.

× Yes I still like going past now but I have so many tasks to do success, do homework, uh attend extra class at school so I have limit of time to going to bath.

✓ Yes, I still like going now, but I have so many tasks to do: study, do homework, and attend extra classes at school, so I have limited time to go to the park.

Multiple errors: 'going past now' is incorrect — use 'going now' or 'going to parks now.' 'tasks to do success' is wrong word choice; use 'study' or 'tasks to complete'. 'attend extra class' needs plural 'classes' and 'so I have limited time' fixes quantifier and adjective order. 'to going to bath' should be 'to go to the park' — correct verb form after 'have time' is base form 'to go' and 'park' instead of 'bath'.

× Yes absolutely I would to like see more parks in my city because park is a peaceful place and is very good for citizen to exercise their but I think it's a more industrial area to see.

✓ Yes, absolutely I would like to see more parks in my city because parks are peaceful places and are very good for citizens to exercise in, but I think it's becoming a more industrial area.

'would to like' is incorrect word order; correct form is 'would like'. Article and number issues: 'park is' should be plural 'parks are' when speaking generally. 'citizen' should be plural 'citizens'. Use 'exercise in' for the correct preposition. The final clause 'it's a more industrial area to see' is ungrammatical; 'it's becoming a more industrial area' expresses the intended meaning.

× Well I want to go to National Park like Dragon park because it's have so many beautiful landscape and have many game that I very enjoy.

✓ Well, I want to go to the national park, like Dragon Park, because it has so many beautiful landscapes and many activities that I really enjoy.

'it's have' is ungrammatical; use 'it has' (there is/has). 'landscape' should be plural 'landscapes' when referring to many scenes. 'have many game' should be 'has many activities' or 'games'. 'that I very enjoy' is incorrect adverb placement and choice; use 'that I really enjoy'. Also proper nouns and articles: 'the national park' and capitalizing 'Dragon Park'.

× I want to go hiking and take many photo of this.

✓ I want to go hiking and take many photos of it.

'photo' should be plural 'photos' to match 'many'. 'of this' is awkward; use 'of it' or 'there' to refer to the park. Verb forms 'want to go' and 'take' are fine; just correct noun number and pronoun.

× I hope I will be there next year which in my holiday.

✓ I hope I will be there next year during my holiday.

The clause 'which in my holiday' is ungrammatical. Use the preposition 'during' to indicate the time period 'during my holiday'. The future tense 'I will be there next year' is appropriate; only the time expression needed correction.