Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be concise and directly answer the question first, then give one or two clear supporting details. Use correct tense and grammar (past for childhood), avoid repetition, and use linking words like 'because' or 'so'. Also correct common errors (e.g., 'a naughty girl' → 'a naughty child'; 'do naughty think' → 'did mischievous things'; 'I always attention to sports' → 'I was always interested in sports').

예시: Yes, I loved going to parks when I was a child because I was very energetic and liked playing games outdoors. For example, I often played football and climbed trees with my friends, so parks were my favorite place to spend the afternoon.

제안: Start with a clear topic sentence (Yes or No). Use simple correct grammar to describe frequency (e.g., 'when I have free time' / 'on weekends') and avoid vague phrases. Use linking words such as 'usually' or 'sometimes' and give one specific activity and effect (why you enjoy it).

예시: Yes, I still like going to parks. I usually visit a park when I have free time on weekends, and I enjoy riding the swings or walking on the trails because it relaxes me and helps me unwind.

제안: Answer directly and give a clear reason with one or two specific details. Reduce fillers ('um', 'uh') and use linking words like 'because' or 'so'. Use correct phrases (e.g., 'it lifts my mood' or 'it relaxes me') and avoid saying 'do all rides'—be specific (playground, cycling, picnics).

예시: Yes, I would like more parks in my city because they provide places for exercise and relaxation. For example, I enjoy cycling and using playground equipment, and having more parks would help me lift my mood and stay active.

제안: Answer directly and state the specific park you want to visit, using correct names and simple grammar. Provide a reason and one or two details about what you want to do there. Avoid hesitations and unclear references. Use linking words such as 'because' and 'for example'.

예시: Yes, I would love to visit a Disney theme park in the future, especially the one in London, because I have always dreamed of seeing the attractions and shows. For example, I want to see the Rapunzel-themed area and try the rides there because they look magical.

× I still love to go to park because as a child I was very naughty girl and I always do naughty think like I don't listen to my parents.

✓ I still love going to parks because as a child I was a very naughty girl and I always did naughty things, like not listening to my parents.

Multiple issues: missing article before 'park' and wrong form 'go to park' (use 'go to parks' or 'going to parks') relates to article and noun form (IDs 22 and 1) but primary problems are sentence structure and verb tense. 'As a child I was very naughty girl' needs the article 'a'. 'I always do naughty think' uses wrong verb tense and noun form; use past tense 'did' for past habitual actions and plural 'things'. 'I don't listen' should be reported in past context as 'not listening to my parents'. Suggested improvement: break into clearer clauses, use appropriate articles, correct noun plurals, and match verb tense to past context. Keep using simple past for past habits and use articles before singular count nouns.

× I always attention to sports and also I always go for park.

✓ I always paid attention to sports and I also always went to the park.

Original sentence lacks correct verb form: 'attention to' requires a verb 'pay attention to'. Because the student is describing past habits, use past tense 'paid' and 'went'. Also use the definite article 'the park' or plural 'parks' depending on meaning. Suggestion: learn collocations like 'pay attention to' and match tense for habitual past actions.

× Yeah, obviously I always when I get to some free times like we all week days and also I go for a holiday and I still do some ride and it's give me some pleasures.

✓ Yes, obviously I still do when I get some free time during weekdays, and I also go on holiday; I still go on rides and they give me pleasure.

Problems: awkward adverb placement and incorrect time expressions. 'I always when I get to some free times like we all week days' is ungrammatical; correct is 'when I get some free time during weekdays.' 'Go for a holiday' should be 'go on holiday.' 'Do some ride' should be 'go on rides' or 'take rides.' 'It's give me some pleasures' has subject-verb agreement and word choice errors; use 'they give me pleasure.' Suggestions: use natural collocations ('free time', 'during weekdays', 'go on holiday', 'go on rides') and ensure subject-verb agreement.

× Uh yeah, obviously I love to do it. Umm, because, umm in park I uh, do all rides.

✓ Uh yes, obviously I love doing that, because in the park I do all the rides.

Use of infinitive 'love to do it' is acceptable, but 'love doing that' sounds more natural. 'In park' needs the article 'the park'. 'Do all rides' should be 'do all the rides' or 'go on all the rides.' Suggestion: include 'the' before 'park' and use 'rides' with 'the' or 'go on' for natural phrasing.

× I also ride uh, cycles and it's give me uh sorry, actually leaves my mood and it's relax me and I love to do it.

✓ I also ride cycles and it actually lifts my mood and relaxes me, and I love doing it.

Problems: 'it's give me' is wrong subject-verb agreement; use 'it gives me' or 'it lifts my mood and relaxes me.' 'Leaves my mood' is incorrect collocation; use 'lifts my mood.' 'It's relax me' should be 'it relaxes me.' Also choose consistent verb forms: 'I love doing it.' Suggestion: practice subject-verb agreement and common collocations ('lift one's mood', 'relax someone').

× Obviously, I would like to go a Disney park umm, it's about umm, I guess, uh in London umm there I see that uh, and it's my dream to go there.

✓ Obviously, I would like to go to a Disney park; I think there is one in London, and it's my dream to go there.

Errors: missing preposition 'to' after 'go' ('go to a Disney park'). 'It's about I guess in London there I see that' is ungrammatical; clearer: 'I think there is one in London.' Use 'there is' to present existence (There be issue ID 3). Suggestion: use 'go to', 'I think' for opinion, and 'there is' to indicate existence.

× I also love Rapunzel spark uh, it's look.

✓ I also love the Rapunzel park; it looks beautiful.

Problems: 'Rapunzel spark' is likely 'Rapunzel park' and needs 'the' before a specific park name. 'It's look' is wrong verb form; use 'it looks' plus an adjective (e.g., 'beautiful'). Suggestion: use correct noun spelling, include articles for specific places, and use correct verb 'looks' with adjectives to describe appearance.