Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Focus on clarity and accurate word choice. Start with a direct topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details. Avoid filler words (umm, uh) and incorrect words (e.g., “bath” instead of “park”). Keep it within 3–4 sentences and use linking words like “and” or “because.”

예시: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. My parents often took me to the neighbourhood park, and I enjoyed playing on the swings and slides with my friends. Those visits were exciting because we spent the whole afternoon running and playing games together.

제안: Be concise and accurate. Give a clear topic sentence and follow with a specific reason. Use correct vocabulary (e.g., “park,” “fresh air,” “relax”) and avoid redundant phrases. Use a linking word like “because” or “so” to connect ideas, and limit to 2–3 sentences.

예시: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks because I like the peaceful atmosphere and fresh air. For example, I often sit on a bench and read or take a short walk to unwind after a busy day.

제안: Make your opinion clear and support it with a specific reason. Use correct nouns and verbs (e.g., “parks,” “people,” “reduce pollution”). Avoid unclear or invented words. Use one linking word like “because” and give a concrete result or example.

예시: Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because more green spaces would improve air quality and give people places to exercise. For instance, a new park with trees and walking paths could help reduce pollution and encourage healthier lifestyles.

제안: Answer directly with the park name, then give specific reasons why you want to visit. Use correct grammar for place names and simple adjectives. Limit to 2–3 sentences and use linking words like “because” or “so.”

예시: Yes, I would like to visit Khao Yai National Park in Thailand in the future because it has beautiful hills, diverse wildlife, and scenic hiking trails. I’m particularly interested in seeing the waterfalls and exploring the park’s nature reserves.

× Yes, I did. I like going to bath as a child.

✓ Yes, I did. I liked going to the park as a child.

The sentence refers to a past habitual action, so the past tense 'liked' should be used instead of present 'like'. Also 'bath' is incorrect noun here; use 'park'. Use past simple for past habits: 'I liked going to the park.' Suggestion: replace present tense verbs with past simple when describing childhood habits and use the correct noun 'park'.

× Actually, umm, my parents took me obtained to going to the bath and I exciting and fun with, uh, my friend to play the slide and the, uh, swing with my friends.

✓ Actually, my parents took me to the park, and I was excited and had fun playing on the slide and the swing with my friends.

Multiple issues: incorrect word 'obtained' and wrong noun 'bath'; missing auxiliary 'was' for 'excited' and wrong verb forms 'exciting and fun'. Use 'took me to the park' for being taken somewhere. Use 'was excited' and 'had fun playing' for past experience. Also ensure parallel structure: 'playing on the slide and the swing.' Suggestion: simplify and use past simple and correct verb phrases: 'took me to the park', 'was excited', 'had fun playing'.

× Yes, absolutely, I still like going to Pasque now because I lovely to enjoy with the beautiful views and relax in the good environment with the abyss of a fresh air is uh, help me to unwind and relax out of the.

✓ Yes, absolutely, I still like going to parks now because I love to enjoy the beautiful views and relax in a pleasant environment with a breath of fresh air; it helps me to unwind and relax.

Use present simple 'love' not 'lovely' (adjective). 'Pasque' is incorrect; use 'parks' or 'the park'. 'Abyss of a fresh air' is incorrect phrase; use 'a breath of fresh air'. 'Is help me' is ungrammatical; use 'it helps me' (present simple). Ensure correct noun articles: 'a pleasant environment'. Suggestion: use correct verbs and noun phrases and present simple for habitual preferences.

× Yes, I would like to see my bags in my city because I think if uh my crunchy have more bar is show their goods, environment and fresh air to help the UMM decry the best pollution in the city.

✓ Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because I think if my community has more parks they will show their benefits, improve the environment, and provide fresh air to help reduce pollution in the city.

Many words are incorrect or misused: 'bags' should be 'parks'; 'crunchy' likely 'community'; 'have' should agree with singular/plural subject 'community has' or use 'communities have'. Pronoun 'they' refers to 'parks'. 'Decry' is wrong; use 'reduce'. Use 'provide fresh air' and 'help reduce pollution'. Suggestion: choose correct nouns and pronouns and ensure subject-verb agreement and correct verbs for intended meaning.

× Yes, I have the unique box that I want to go to in the future, I would like to go the Kao Yai is the National Park in Thailand, is the very hills National Park and have a lot of the good environment, beautiful.

✓ Yes, I have a place that I want to go to in the future. I would like to visit Khao Yai National Park in Thailand; it is a hilly national park with beautiful scenery and a good environment.

Run-on sentence and many incorrect words: 'unique box' should be 'place'; 'go the Kao Yai is the National Park' should be 'visit Khao Yai National Park'. Use 'it is a hilly national park' for description. Use 'beautiful scenery' and 'a good environment' for clarity. Break into two sentences for clarity and correct article use 'a place'. Suggestion: use clear nouns, correct word order, and separate ideas into sentences; use 'visit' for destinations.