Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: ・簡潔で正しい文法を使うこと。現在の答えは時制や語順の誤り（'I like to going'、'when I was child'）や繰り返しが多いです。 ・主題文を明確にし、その後で具体例（何をしたか、誰と遊んだか）を1〜2文で補足すること。 ・話の流れを自然にするために接続語（e.g. "because", "and", "so"）を適切に使うこと。

예시: Yes. I loved going to parks as a child because I could play baseball there with my brother and sister. We often spent whole afternoons running around and playing games, which made those visits very memorable.

제안: ・冗長な繰り返し（'I like I like', 'sometimes I I'）を避け、短く明確に述べること。 ・理由を1つか2つに絞り、論理的な接続語（e.g. "because", "so"）でつなげること。 ・文を完結に保ち、余分なフィラー（'Yeah', 'Also I.'）を減らす。

예시: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks. I go there when I need to relax because being surrounded by trees helps me clear my mind and reduce stress.

제안: ・否定の意見を述べる場合は、明確な主題文（'No'）の後に理由を短く示すこと。 ・曖昧な表現（'a good place for me'）を具体化し、繰り返しや中断を避ける。 ・必要なら対比（例えば他の人の意見）を一文で追加して会話を豊かにする。

예시: No, I don't think more parks are necessary because there are already many near my home and I can easily access them. However, I understand others might want more green spaces in other neighborhoods.

제안: ・時制と語順を正しく使うこと（'When I was a child'、'I went to Vancouver'）。 ・訪れたい理由を具体的に説明する（何が特に魅力か）。 ・文を完結にし、余分な中断や繰り返しを避ける。

예시: Yes. I would like to visit Stanley Park in Vancouver again. I studied English there as a child and remember the park being huge and very natural, so I'd like to go back to enjoy the forests and coastal views.

× Yes, I like I like to going to the park when I was child because just just could play baseball in the park and also play with my brother and sister.

✓ Yes, I liked going to the park when I was a child because I could play baseball there and also play with my brother and sister.

The sentence mixes present tense 'I like' with past time reference 'when I was child'. Use past tense 'liked' for habitual past actions. Also use the gerund 'going' after 'liked' (not 'to going'), include the article 'a' before 'child', and include the subject 'I' before 'could' for clarity. Remove duplicated words 'I like I like' and 'just just'. Suggestion: keep tense consistent for time phrases and avoid repetition.

× Yes, sometimes I like I like going to park because sometimes I I want to be relaxed and change my mind Yeah, it's go. I think it's the best way to go to the park Yeah Also I.

✓ Yes, sometimes I like going to the park because sometimes I want to relax and change my mind. I think it's the best way to do that.

The original has repeated phrases 'I like I like' and 'sometimes I I' and omits the article before 'park'. Use 'going to the park' with the definite article. Use the verb 'relax' (base form) after 'want to', not 'be relaxed'. 'Change my mind' is fine but 'it's go' is incorrect; replace with 'do that' or 'relax there'. Remove filler words and finish the sentence coherently.

× Actually, no, because there are many parks around my house and also there's a good place for me. Yeah, that's why I, I, I don't want to see more any parks, but.

✓ Actually, no, because there are many parks around my house and there is a good one near me. That's why I don't want to see any more parks.

Problems: awkward phrase 'there's a good place for me' and incorrect word order 'see more any parks'. Use 'a good one' to refer to a single park and place 'any' before 'more' in 'any more parks' or better 'any more parks' as a unit. Remove repeated fillers 'I, I, I' and trailing 'but'.

× Yes, there's a park in Vancouver. When I when I was children, I went to the Vancouver to study English. There is huge park. It's very natural and good conditions. So in the future I will go to.

✓ Yes, there is a park in Vancouver. When I was a child, I went to Vancouver to study English. There is a huge park there. It is very natural and in good condition. So in the future I will go there again.

Multiple errors: 'when I was children' mixes plural 'children' with singular subject; use 'a child'. Do not use 'the' before 'Vancouver' unless a specific usage; use 'went to Vancouver'. 'There is huge park' needs article 'a huge park'. 'Good conditions' is vague; use 'in good condition' or 'has good facilities' depending on meaning. Sentence ending 'I will go to' is incomplete; add 'there again' to complete the idea. Remove duplicate 'when I when I'.