Travelling— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: 「window side」より自然な「window seat」を使い、冒頭の「if I had to say I'd probably say」のような重複表現を避けましょう。最初に好みを直接述べ、その後に「because」や「so」を使って理由を簡潔に説明すると、より自然で効果的です。また、「everything like landscapes and the people there」はやや不自然なので、「the scenery」や「how people live in different places」のように具体的かつ自然な表現にしましょう。

예시: Yes, I definitely prefer a window seat because I enjoy looking at the scenery during a journey. I can see beautiful landscapes and observe how people live in different places. It also makes the trip feel more relaxing and interesting.

제안: 「Yes,」の後にコンマを置き、「when I was very young」よりも質問に対応した「when I was a child」を使うと明確です。具体例を挙げている点は良いですが、「Hokkado」は「Hokkaido」、「miso lamong」「gloom lump」「especially Memo」は意味が不明確または誤認識と思われるため、料理名を正確に発音し、必要なら簡単に説明しましょう。最後は「which made the trip especially memorable」のように、旅行が印象的だった理由を自然にまとめてください。

예시: Yes, I went on several long trips with my parents when I was a child. I especially remember visiting Hokkaido, where we ate local dishes such as miso ramen and grilled seafood. The delicious food and beautiful scenery made the trip especially memorable.

× ...everyday life in that distinct areas...

✓ ...everyday life in those distinct areas...

The plural noun areas requires the plural demonstrative those, not the singular demonstrative that. Make sure demonstratives agree in number with the nouns they modify.

× ...if I sit on the window side.

✓ ...if I sit by the window.

The natural preposition for describing a seat next to a window is by. The expression on the window side is not idiomatic in this context. Use sit by the window or sit next to the window.

× ...which made me the trip especially Memo.

✓ ...which made the trip especially memorable for me.

The original sentence has an incorrect word order and is missing the adjective memorable. In the structure make + object + adjective, the correct order is made the trip memorable. The phrase for me identifies whose impression the trip made.