Travelling— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Improve clarity and accuracy: correct pronunciation/word choice (e.g., scenery, landscapes), reduce redundancy, and break into 2–3 concise sentences. Add a clear topic sentence, one supporting reason with a specific example, and a linking word to connect ideas.

예시: Yes, I usually prefer a window seat when I travel. I enjoy listening to music while watching the scenery change, especially different landscapes like fields and mountains, because it makes the journey feel shorter and more relaxing.

제안: Make the response more structured and specific: begin with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific examples and a brief reflection using linking words (for example, because, which). Correct phrasing (e.g., "my first experience of different cultures").

예시: Yes, I did. My family travelled to several countries when I was a child, for example Spain and France. Those trips gave me my first experience of different cultures and foods, which I still remember fondly because I loved trying new dishes and seeing historic sites.

× Yes, I prefer to sit by the window when I travel because I enjoy listening to music and watching the scannery Sjanerina Sukun pass by, for example, on terrain's, I like to watch changing land space and it helps me on making the journey feel shorter and more enjoyable.

✓ Yes, I prefer to sit by the window when I travel because I enjoy listening to music and watching the scenery pass by; for example, on terrains I like to watch the changing landscape, and it helps make the journey feel shorter and more enjoyable.

This sentence has several preposition and word-choice issues: 'scannery' is a misspelling of 'scenery'; 'pass by' is correct but 'Sjanerina Sukun' appears to be a name and is unclear so was removed to focus on grammar; 'on terrain's' incorrectly uses a preposition and possessive apostrophe—use 'on terrains' or better 'in rural areas' depending on meaning; 'watch changing land space' is unnatural—use 'the changing landscape'; 'helps me on making' is incorrect preposition use—use 'helps make' (no preposition and no extra subject). Suggestion: use correct nouns and avoid unnecessary prepositions: 'watch the scenery pass by', 'on terrains' -> 'in rural areas' or 'across the terrain', and 'helps make the journey' rather than 'helps me on making'.

× Yes, I did. I travelled to several different countries with my family when I was a child, and I remember feeling excited about seeing new places for example we visited Spain and France which gave me my first experience over of different cultures and food.

✓ Yes, I did. I traveled to several countries with my family when I was a child, and I remember feeling excited about seeing new places. For example, we visited Spain and France, which gave me my first experience of different cultures and food.

Problems include punctuation and an awkward phrase 'first experience over of' which mixes prepositions. 'first experience of' is correct. Also run-on sentence—needs a period or connector before 'for example'. Use commas to set off the relative clause: 'Spain and France, which gave me...'. Suggestion: break long sentences into shorter ones, use 'experience of' not 'experience over of', and add appropriate commas and periods. Note: 'travelled' (British) vs 'traveled' (American) both correct; keep consistent spelling.