Travelling— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a direct topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid repetition and awkward phrases (e.g. “catch up myself”, “what what”).

예시: Yes, I usually look out of the window when I travel by bus or car because it helps me relax. For example, I often watch changing landscapes and use the time to think about plans for my career or upcoming trips, which makes the journey feel productive.

제안: Give a clearer topic sentence and one concrete detail about when or why you take photos. Use linking words to connect reasons and avoid redundant phrases like “never forget and to memorize”.

예시: Yes, I often take photos of scenery from the car to remember special places. For instance, when I see a beautiful beach or dramatic cliffs, I take a quick photo so I can look back on the view and share it with friends later.

제안: Answer directly and finish the sentence. State a clear preference, then give one or two contrasting reasons using linking words. Correct vocabulary (use “coastal” not “cost”) and remove trailing fragments.

예시: I prefer the sea because I grew up on an island and feel most comfortable with coastal views and beaches. However, I also enjoy visiting mountains for the fresh air and different activities, so I like both in different ways.

× I definitely look out throughout the windows when I'm traveling because it helps me to unwind and sometimes I catch up myself thinking of what I can imagine for the future of my next plan, what what scenario I want to discover.

✓ I definitely look out through the windows when I'm traveling because it helps me unwind, and sometimes I find myself thinking about possible plans and scenarios I want to explore in the future.

Errors: 'look out throughout the windows' uses incorrect preposition and 'throughout' is wrong (preposition issue, ID 11) and 'catch up myself' is incorrect collocation and reflexive use (should be 'find myself', reflexive/pronoun issue ID 15/12). The sentence also uses awkward '-ing' forms and extra words. Suggestion: use 'look out through the windows' for correct preposition, 'helps me unwind' (no to infinitive), and 'find myself thinking about' for natural reflexive verb. Simplify 'the future of my next plan' to 'in the future' or 'possible plans'.

× I definitely appreciate photographing a vast array of landscapes and breathtaking beaches, and it helps me to never forget and to memorize these moments and to keep in mind.

✓ I definitely enjoy photographing a wide range of landscapes and breathtaking beaches, and it helps me remember and keep these moments in mind.

Errors: 'appreciate photographing' is grammatical but sounds unnatural; 'appreciate' usually takes noun phrase or '-ing' for appreciating action but 'enjoy' is better (word choice/adverb/adjective issue ID 13). Redundant infinitives 'to never forget and to memorize' are awkward (verb form issue ID 8/9). 'Keep in mind' needs object. Suggestion: use 'enjoy photographing' and concise verbs 'helps me remember and keep these moments in mind.'

× As I grew up on an island and definitely preferred the cost of views and the breathtaking beaches which are landscaped more familiar for me, but however I also appreciate discovering new scenery like mountains, but I'm quite.

✓ I grew up on an island, so I definitely prefer the coastal views and the breathtaking beaches, which are more familiar to me; however, I also enjoy discovering new scenery like mountains.

Errors: sentence contains multiple structural problems: unnecessary conjunctions 'but however' and multiple 'but's (conjunction error ID 16), 'preferred' tense mismatch (past vs present preference — use present 'prefer', tense issue ID 6), 'cost of views' is incorrect phrase (word choice/preposition ID 11/13), 'landscaped more familiar for me' is ungrammatical (adjective/adverb and preposition errors ID 13/11), and sentence ends abruptly 'but I'm quite.' (sentence fragment, sentence without verb ID 23). Suggestion: simplify structure: state background in past 'I grew up on an island', state current preference 'I prefer coastal views', and add contrast with 'however' followed by 'I also enjoy...' Remove fragments and redundant words.