Building— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be direct and concise: start with a clear topic sentence, correct tense and grammar, and give one or two specific details. Avoid repetition and unclear phrases. Use linking words if adding details.

예시: Yes. I live in the city, so there are many tall buildings near my home and I can see several skyscrapers from my window. For example, a 30-story office tower stands across the street, and a residential high-rise is two blocks away.

제안: This answer is generally good: it directly answers the question and gives reasons. Improve by removing hesitations, using smoother linking words and one brief example of what you photograph and why.

예시: Yes. I'm studying architecture, so I often photograph building façades and structural details to study their design. For example, I recently took photos of a local library to analyze its glass curtain wall and share the images on my architecture Instagram.

제안: Answer directly, correct minor grammatical errors, remove filler words, and add a specific reason plus one detail about what you want to see. Use a linking phrase to connect ideas.

예시: Yes. I would like to visit the Guggenheim Museum in Bilbao because I am fascinated by modern architecture, especially buildings with titanium façades. In particular, I want to see how the curved titanium panels catch light and to study the building’s innovative forms.

제안: Good direct response and clear reason. Make the sentence structure smoother, correct small grammar issues, and add a brief example or consequence to support your reason.

예시: No, I don't. I'm afraid of heights, so I wouldn't feel comfortable living in a very tall apartment. For example, I worry about evacuating quickly during an emergency, which makes high-rise living unappealing to me.

× Yes, I will live in a city so there are lots of tall buildings near my house and I can see them from my window.

✓ Yes, I live in a city, so there are lots of tall buildings near my house and I can see them from my window.

The student used 'will live' which implies a future action but the context asks about current surroundings. Use present simple 'I live' to describe a current state. Suggestion: use present tense for current habits or facts (I live, I work, etc.).

× And one other thing that because it is because the generation group that there are lots of tall builds.

✓ Another thing is that because of the generation group, there are lots of tall buildings.

Original sentence is ungrammatical and redundant ('that because it is because'). Rearranged into a clear clause: 'Another thing is that' followed by reason introduced with 'because of'. Also corrected 'builds' to 'buildings'. Suggestion: avoid redundant connectors and choose one clear structure to express a reason (Another thing is that... / Because...).

× Yes, of course, right now I'm, uh, learning architecture, so it's very interesting for me to look at the design of buildings carefully and take ideas from them.

✓ Yes, of course. Right now I'm studying architecture, so it's very interesting for me to look at the design of buildings carefully and take ideas from them.

'Learning architecture' is acceptable, but 'studying architecture' is more natural. No major grammar error, but improved verb choice and punctuation. Suggestion: use 'studying' for formal education and separate clauses with proper punctuation.

× And I also post them on my Instagram that is for architecture.

✓ I also post them on my Instagram account, which is for architecture.

The relative clause was awkward. Use 'which is for architecture' to modify 'Instagram account' and include 'account' for clarity. Suggestion: use 'which' for non-restrictive clauses and add the noun being modified.

× Yes. I really like to uh, see Guggenheim museum in Bilbao from face to face because uh, I really interested in modern buildings that uh, have titanium facades so uh.

✓ Yes. I would really like to see the Guggenheim Museum in Bilbao in person because I am really interested in modern buildings that have titanium facades.

Multiple issues: 'see ... from face to face' is incorrect — use 'in person'. 'Guggenheim museum' needs 'the' and capitalization. 'I really interested' lacks the verb 'am'. Removed filler 'uh' and 'so uh'. Suggestion: use complete clauses with subject + verb (I am interested) and correct idioms ('in person').

× No I don't because I really afraid of tall buildings and height and because of that I don't want to live in very high apartments and also it is really scary if an emergency happened.

✓ No, I don't because I'm really afraid of tall buildings and heights, and for that reason I don't want to live in very high apartments. It would also be really scary if an emergency happened.

Missing verb 'am' after 'I' ('I really afraid' -> 'I'm really afraid'). 'Height' should be plural 'heights' in this context. Split into two sentences and use 'It would also be' to express hypothetical/emotional consequence. Suggestion: ensure the verb 'to be' is present after pronouns when needed and use plural forms where appropriate; separate long clauses for clarity.