Food— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and use varied vocabulary. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give 2–3 specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid repeating words like "that" and reduce redundancy.

예시: I love sinigang, a Filipino sour soup. It usually contains vegetables and can include shrimp, pork or fish, which gives each version a distinct flavor. For example, pork sinigang is rich and hearty, while the shrimp version tastes lighter and slightly sweet.

제안: Organize your answer into a clear topic sentence and concise supporting details. Avoid informal fillers and unclear phrases. Use linking words (for example, therefore) and give one specific example or brief consequence.

예시: When I was a child, my favourite snack was Oreos. I ate them for breakfast and packed them for school, so I rarely ate balanced meals. As a result, my mother often urged me to have proper breakfasts like eggs and fruit.

제안: Provide a clearer topic sentence and give specific seasonal examples. Use linking words (for instance, in summer/at festivals) and avoid vague phrases like "cultured foods."

예시: Yes, I do. For example, in winter I prefer hot soups and stews, while in summer I choose lighter dishes like salads and grilled fish. Also, during cultural festivals I try traditional dishes from other countries to broaden my tastes.

제안: Be more concise and accurate with descriptions. Start with a clear statement about the change, then give 2–3 specific sensory details and a brief reason for your preference, using linking words.

예시: Yes, it has. I used to prefer sinigang, but now I favour laksa, a spicy Singaporean noodle soup. It combines shrimp, squid balls and vegetables in a creamy, slightly sweet and spicy broth, which I find more satisfying and flavourful.

× My favorite food would be Sinigang.

✓ My favorite food is sinigang.

Using 'would be' suggests conditional or hypothetical mood. The question asks a simple fact about preference, so the simple present 'is' is correct. Use simple present to state general preferences.

× It is a Filipino soup that is sour that is mixed with vegetables, sometimes shrimp, sometimes pork, sometimes fish.

✓ It is a Filipino sour soup mixed with vegetables and sometimes shrimp, pork, or fish.

The original repeats 'that' and uses awkward word order. Combine modifiers ('Filipino sour soup') and use parallel lists with commas and 'or' for alternatives. This improves clarity and grammatical flow.

× There are different kinds of varieties of it depending on which ones you like.

✓ There are different varieties of it depending on which you like.

'Kinds of varieties' is redundant. Use either 'kinds' or 'varieties.' Also 'which ones you like' is wordy; 'which you like' is more natural. Ensure plurality matches 'varieties' and the relative pronoun is concise.

× When I was younger I used to just eat Oreos all the time.

✓ When I was younger, I used to eat Oreos all the time.

No major tense error, but remove filler 'just' for clarity and add a comma after the time clause. 'Used to' correctly indicates a past habitual action.

× Like I would have it for breakfast and then my mom would tell me eat proper breakfast and after that I would eat it for dessert, then for lunch, then for school.

✓ For example, I would have them for breakfast, and then my mom would tell me to eat a proper breakfast; after that I would have them for dessert, then for lunch, and even at school.

Sentence needs clearer structure and correct infinitive after 'tell me' ('to eat'). Use plural 'them' to refer to Oreos. Break into clauses with punctuation and parallel list structure for clarity.

× I remember bringing it to school as my snack all the time.

✓ I remember bringing them to school as my snack all the time.

Pronoun should agree in number with 'Oreos' (plural), so use 'them' instead of 'it.' Maintain consistency across references.

× And our charity, all my other friends.

✓ Also, my other friends did the same.

Original is a sentence fragment and unclear. Provide a complete sentence that conveys the intended meaning: other friends also brought or ate Oreos. Use subject and verb for a complete sentence.

× Yes I do.

✓ Yes, I do.

Add comma after 'Yes' for correct punctuation in speech transcription. The present tense 'do' is appropriate to answer the question.

× Now that I've grown, I don't just stick to 1 variety of food.

✓ Now that I've grown, I don't just stick to one type of food.

Use 'one' spelled out in text and 'type' is more natural than 'variety' here. 'Stick to' is fine; ensure number-word formatting and noun choice match.

× I try to explore different kinds of food nowadays and just explore different kinds of cultured foods that I haven't tried.

✓ I try different kinds of food nowadays and explore various cuisines that I haven't tried.

Avoid repeating 'explore.' Use 'try' with 'kinds of food' and 'various cuisines' is a clearer phrase than 'cultured foods.' This corrects redundancy and word choice.

× Yes it has before.

✓ Yes, it has.

'Yes it has before' is awkward; 'Yes, it has' properly answers whether favorite food has changed. If 'before' is needed, rephrase to 'It has changed before,' but simple 'Yes, it has' is natural. Add comma after 'Yes.'

× I used to love sinigang but now I love laksa.

✓ I used to love sinigang, but now I love laksa.

Add comma before 'but' to join two independent clauses. Tenses correctly contrast past habitual ('used to') with present ('now I love').

× It is a Singaporean sour noodle that has shrimp as well.

✓ It is a Singaporean sour noodle soup that also has shrimp.

'Sour noodle' is awkward; 'sour noodle soup' clarifies the food type. Use 'also' for natural adverb placement and smoother word order.

× It has squid balls and it has veggies and it has a right amount of spiciness and sweetness to it.

✓ It has squid balls, vegetables, and the right balance of spiciness and sweetness.

Avoid repetitive 'it has' by using a list separated with commas. Use 'vegetables' instead of informal 'veggies' and 'right balance of' is more natural than 'a right amount of ... to it.'

× But I just keep going back to eat it again.

✓ But I keep going back to eat it.

'Just' and 'again' are redundant together; remove one ('again' or 'just'). Present simple 'keep going back to eat it' correctly expresses repeated action. Also remove 'just' for conciseness.