Walking— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and use a clear topic sentence, then add one specific supporting detail. Avoid repetition (e.g., “sometimes” twice) and use linking words to connect ideas.

예시: Yes, I walk quite often. I especially enjoy walking around my neighborhood because the scenery is pleasant and I can watch people going about their day, which helps me relax.

제안: Use correct tense and a clear structure: topic sentence about frequency, then a reason. Replace awkward phrasing and add a linking word. Keep it to two or three sentences.

예시: Not very often. I occasionally walked outside as a child because my parents and grandmother were strict, so I needed their permission before I could go out.

제안: Start with a concise topic sentence and group similar ideas. Use linking words (for example, also) and provide one clear specific example. Avoid short fragments.

예시: People like walking in parks because it helps them relax and enjoy nature. For example, families often go for walks together and have picnics, which makes parks a social and peaceful place.

제안: Give a direct topic sentence and one or two specific supporting details, using correct articles and prepositions. Use linking words to add clarity and avoid repetition.

예시: If I had the chance, I would take a long walk along a beach. I would stroll along the shoreline at a resort, enjoy the sea views and relax in the fresh air.

제안: This short answer is acceptable but could be improved with one brief specific detail and a linking word. Keep it one or two sentences.

예시: I recently went for a walk in our neighborhood. I usually walk along the main street where there are trees and small shops, which makes the walk pleasant.

× Yes, sometimes I do walk a lot.

✓ Yes, sometimes I walk a lot.

The auxiliary 'do' is unnecessary in a positive present simple statement and sounds unnatural here. Use the plain present simple 'I walk' to indicate habitual action. Suggestion: remove 'do' unless forming a question or emphasis (e.g., 'I do walk a lot' for strong emphasis).

× Sometimes I just love walking, looking at that scenery, the view here in our place, and I get to see a lot of people.

✓ Sometimes I just love walking, looking at the scenery and the view here in our area, and I get to see a lot of people.

'That scenery' is odd with 'here'; use 'the scenery'. 'In our place' is informal; 'in our area' is more natural. The present participle phrases 'walking, looking' are fine; adjust nouns for natural collocations. Suggestion: prefer 'the scenery' and 'our area' for clarity and natural speech.

× Sometimes I used to walk outside when I was a child if I get a permission to go out because my parents and also my grandmother are too strict whenever I go out.

✓ Sometimes I used to walk outside when I was a child if I got permission to go out because my parents and my grandmother were too strict whenever I went out.

Mixed tenses: 'used to' requires past tense in the condition clause ('if I got permission'). 'Get a permission' is ungrammatical; use 'got permission' (no article). 'Are' and 'go' must be in past ('were', 'went') to match 'when I was a child'. Suggestion: keep all verbs in the past when describing habitual past actions.

× People like to walk in parks, to relax, to chill and to see the outside.

✓ People like to walk in parks to relax, chill, and enjoy the outdoors.

The original has awkward phrasing 'to see the outside.' Parallelism and word choice are improved by using 'enjoy the outdoors.' Also remove the extra comma after 'parks' for smoother flow. Suggestion: use parallel verb forms and natural collocations like 'enjoy the outdoors.'

× To see other people but with their friends and family.

✓ They also like to see other people, often together with their friends and family.

This fragment lacks a clear subject and verb. Rewriting it as a full sentence clarifies meaning and connects it to the previous idea. Suggestion: turn fragments into complete sentences and maintain coherence with the previous sentence.

× Example if they want to have picnic in the parks.

✓ For example, if they want to have a picnic in the park.

'Example' should be 'For example' and the clause needs to be integrated. Use 'a picnic' (singular) and 'the park' or 'parks' consistently; 'in the parks' is odd here—use 'in the park' or 'in parks' depending on context. Suggestion: use 'For example' and correct article usage: 'a picnic in the park.'

× If I am given a chance to take a long walk, I want to do it in a beach, stroll the the scenery in a resort and to relax there.

✓ If I were given the chance to take a long walk, I would like to do it on a beach, stroll and enjoy the scenery at a resort, and relax there.

This is a hypothetical conditional referring to an unreal present/future situation: use 'If I were given' (or 'If I were to be given') and 'would' or 'would like.' Use 'on a beach' (correct preposition), and avoid repeating 'to' unnecessarily; use parallel verbs 'stroll and enjoy.' Also fix duplicate 'the the.' Suggestion: use second conditional structure and correct prepositions ('on a beach', 'at a resort').

× Here in our neighborhood.

✓ I went for a walk here in our neighborhood.

The original is a sentence fragment without a verb. The examiner asked 'Where did you go for a walk lately?' so a past-tense full sentence is required: 'I went.' Suggestion: answer with a complete past-tense sentence that directly responds to the question.