Walking— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and natural: give a clear topic sentence, then one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid repetition ("I don't walk a lot" said twice) and awkward phrases like "roads are not walkable."

예시: Not really. In my city most streets lack sidewalks, so I usually drive to work. However, I try to stay active by going for runs in the park when I have free time.

제안: Start with a direct topic sentence and expand with a specific reason or short example. Avoid fillers like "And yeah." Use a linking word to connect the reason.

예시: Not often. Because my parents were very protective, they preferred I play at home, so I rarely went for neighborhood walks as a child.

제안: Make your answer more natural and avoid repeating the word "people". Give two clear, connected reasons with linking words and a brief example or result. Avoid vague phrases like "it's walkable" and filler "yeah."

예시: Many people walk in parks because it's good for their health and easier to walk there than on busy streets. In addition, parks have clean air and pleasant scenery, so walking there helps people relax and reduce stress.

제안: Give a concise topic sentence and then two specific, varied reasons using linking words. Avoid listing adjectives without connection. Mention what you would do or how you would feel during the walk to make it more vivid.

예시: I'd love to walk along Bondi Beach in Australia because the sea breeze and warm weather make it very pleasant. Also, the coastal views are spectacular, so a long walk there would be relaxing and offer lots of photo opportunities.

제안: Answer directly and avoid uncertainty. If you can't remember, say when approximately or give a recent activity instead. Use linking words to connect ideas and avoid contradictory statements (saying you don't remember but then speculating).

예시: I don't remember the exact date, but I usually go for short runs in the park at least once a week. Running helps me stay fit and lets me enjoy nature, so I often combine running with a short walk afterwards.

× In the Philippines roads are not walkable so I don't walk a lot.

✓ In the Philippines, the roads are not walkable, so I don't walk a lot.

This sentence needs the definite article 'the' before 'roads' because we refer to roads in a specific place (the Philippines) in general. Also add commas for clarity. Use 'the roads' to indicate that roads in that country are being described.

× I use my car to go to work and usually or basically for everyday use so I don't walk a lot.

✓ I use my car to go to work and usually for everyday use, so I don't walk a lot.

Remove the redundant 'or basically' which makes the coordination awkward. Place a comma before 'so' as it links two independent clauses. Keep 'usually' to indicate frequency.

× However, I run when I have my free time.

✓ However, I run when I have free time.

Omit the unnecessary possessive 'my' before 'free time' because 'have free time' is the natural collocation. This is a wording preference to sound more fluent.

× When I was a child, my parents were very protective, so I didn't go on walks a lot.

✓ When I was a child, my parents were very protective, so I didn't go on walks very often.

Replace 'a lot' with 'very often' after a negative past-tense clause for more natural phrasing. The past tense 'didn't go' is correct.

× I think people like to walk in parks because people nowadays are health conscious.

✓ I think people like to walk in parks because nowadays people are health-conscious.

Avoid repeating 'people' twice in the same sentence; reorder to 'nowadays people' or 'people nowadays'. Add a hyphen in 'health-conscious' as a compound adjective.

× They like walking in parks because it's walkable.

✓ They like walking in parks because parks are walkable.

The pronoun 'it' is unclear; replace with the noun 'parks' for clarity. 'Walkable' describes parks, so use the plural noun.

× Aside from this, the area is fresh and yeah.

✓ Aside from this, the area is fresh and pleasant.

Avoid informal filler 'yeah' in a spoken-test answer; replace with a descriptive adjective like 'pleasant' to complete the sentence structure and sound more appropriate.

× If I would have a chance to take a long walk, I would go to Bondi Beach.

✓ If I had a chance to take a long walk, I would go to Bondi Beach.

In the second conditional, use 'if I had' (simple past) rather than 'if I would have'. 'If I would have' is ungrammatical in standard English.

× Bondi Beach in Australia is breezy, it's warm, it's fresh.

✓ Bondi Beach in Australia is breezy, warm, and refreshing.

Combine adjectives without repeating 'it's' and use 'refreshing' rather than 'fresh' to describe the atmosphere. This improves fluency and parallel structure.

× So walking in Bondi Beach also gives you a great scenery of the beach itself.

✓ So walking at Bondi Beach also gives you great scenery of the beach itself.

Use the preposition 'at' with proper names of beaches. Do not use the indefinite article 'a' before 'great scenery' (uncountable); remove it. The phrase 'of the beach itself' is redundant but acceptable; consider 'of the beach' or simply 'great beach views.'

× I can't remember when I went for a walk lately, however, I am health conscious so I stay fit and I run during my free time.

✓ I can't remember the last time I went for a walk; however, I am health-conscious, so I stay fit and run during my free time.

Use 'the last time' for clarity instead of 'when I went for a walk lately.' Hyphenate 'health-conscious.' Use a semicolon or comma plus conjunction to link clauses, and remove the extra 'I' before 'run' for conciseness.

× But if I would probably have a chance to walk, I would.

✓ But if I had the chance to walk, I probably would.

Again, use the second conditional 'if I had' rather than 'if I would have.' Place 'probably' before the modal 'would' for natural word order: 'probably would.'