Walking— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: 回答要更自然、句子更准确并避免词汇错误和冗余。注意时态和用词（例如“work”用错，应为“walk”或“spend time”），将信息浓缩为不超过五句并使用连接词。可补充简短原因或频率的具体细节。

예시: Yes, I walk a lot because I enjoy hanging out with my friends. We often spend more than three hours wandering around shopping malls. Walking there is both social and relaxing, so I walk almost every weekend.

제안: 注意时态和主谓一致（应使用过去式和正确的主语形式），句子要更具体并避免含糊表达。把意见和具体例子分开，用连接词如“because”或“so”。同时改正语法错误如“were young”应为“was young”或“when I was a child”。

예시: Yes, I often went outside for walks when I was a child because it helped me calm down. The area near my apartment had a small park and quiet streets, so I played and walked there regularly.

제안: 回答较为清楚，但有重复和单复数错误，且句子可更简洁自然。使用连接词并给出具体好处，例如健康或社交方面的具体例子。避免重复短语“make people make people”。

예시: People like walking in parks because they offer fresh air and sunshine, which help reduce stress and improve mood. For example, a short walk among trees can make you feel more relaxed and energetic.

제안: 句子冗长且有搭配和措辞问题（例如“on the mountain in the city center”听来矛盾，‘environmental park’用词不自然）。应更精准描述地点并说明原因，使用连接词简洁表述。

예시: If I had the chance, I would take a long walk in the large park near the city center because it is a beautiful green space. Many locals visit it for fresh air and great city views.

제안: 回答中存在断句和语法问题（例如‘two station’应为‘two stations away’，句子断断续续，重复信息）。重组句子，使用连词并给出具体细节如距离、设施或感觉，保持自然流畅。

예시: I recently walked in a nearby park about two stations away from my home. It was very quiet and surrounded by trees, with several benches where people can sit and relax.

× Yes, I do walk a lot as I am a big fan of hanging out with my friends.

✓ Yes, I walk a lot as I am a big fan of hanging out with my friends.

句子中使用“do walk”不是必要的，陈述一般现在时直接用动词原形（I walk）。“do”用于强调或构成疑问与否定句，这里不需要强调，因此删除“do”。建议：平时陈述习惯性动作时直接使用一般现在时（I walk）。

× We often work for more than three hours a day when we are wandering in a shopping mall.

✓ We often spend more than three hours a day wandering in a shopping mall.

原句中用“work”与语境不符，且“when we are wandering”时态和结构不自然。应使用“spend ... wandering”来表达“在购物中心逛时花费时间”。建议：用动词短语“spend time doing sth.”表达花费时间做某事，动名词形式跟在spend之后。

× I think I did often go outside to have a walk when I were young as it is a good way for naughty kids to calm down and the environment just in front my department was quite good.

✓ I think I often went outside for a walk when I was young because it was a good way for naughty kids to calm down, and the area in front of my apartment was quite nice.

原句有多处时态和形式错误：1) “did often go”在陈述过去习惯时通常用“often went”（过去时）而不用助动词did；2) 主语是第一人称，过去式应为“was”而不是“were”；3) “as it is a good way”时态应与主句保持过去：“because it was a good way”；4) “just in front my department”介词和名词使用错误，应为“in front of my apartment/department”，此处更自然用“apartment/area”。建议：表达过去习惯用一般过去时（often + past tense），注意主谓一致和正确介词短语“in front of”。

× As parks have a really nice environment that is full of fresh air and warm sunlight, this places can make people make people calm down and feel less stressful.

✓ As parks have a really nice environment full of fresh air and warm sunlight, these places can make people calm down and feel less stressed.

错误包括：1) “this places”代词与复数名词不一致，应为“these places”；2) 重复“make people”应删除重复；3) 形容词/分词形式错误，“less stressful”意思是“较少有压力（的）”，更合适的是“feel less stressed”表示人感觉更不紧张。建议：注意代词与名词数的一致，避免重复短语，使用正确的形容词/过去分词搭配（feel + 形容词/过去分词）。

× I would like to take a long walk on the mountain in the city center if I had the chance, as it is a very famous huge environmental park that is popular among citizens in my city.

✓ I would like to take a long walk on the mountain in the city center if I had the chance, as it is a very large, well-known urban environmental park popular with the citizens of my city.

原句问题：1) “very famous huge”形容词顺序和搭配不自然，应使用“very large, well-known”或“huge and famous”；2) “environmental park that is popular among citizens in my city”表达啰嗦且介词选择更自然为“popular with the citizens of my city”。建议：调整形容词顺序，使用更自然的短语“popular with”并去掉冗余词。

× I recently went for a walk in a nearby park, just about two station away from my home.

✓ I recently went for a walk in a nearby park, just about two stations away from my home.

问题是复数形式缺失，“two station”应为“two stations”。建议：数字后面的可数名词要用复数。

× It is quite nice place and it has very quiet. Resting place.

✓ It is a quite nice place and very quiet, with a resting area.

原句结构混乱：1) 缺少冠词“a quite nice place”；2) “it has very quiet”不合语法，应改为“very quiet”或“It is very quiet”；3) “Resting place.”作为单独句子不完整，合并为“with a resting area”。建议：使用完整句子并注意冠词与形容词位置，连接短句以保证通顺。

× This is surrounded with trees.

✓ It is surrounded by trees.

被动结构错误：正确的被动短语是“be surrounded by”，而不是“surrounded with”。建议：被动表达“被……包围”时使用“surrounded by”。