Hobby— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and add a linking phrase to connect ideas; include a brief specific example or recent title to show engagement. Keep within 3–4 sentences and avoid repetition.

예시: Yes, I enjoy reading, especially thrillers and mysteries. For example, I recently read The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo on my e-reader. Reading helps me relax after a busy day and fall asleep more easily.

제안: Correct grammar (tense and articles) and improve coherence with linking words. Make a clear contrast between past and present, and give one reason or short detail about future plans.

예시: Yes. When I was a child I played badminton regularly because my family loved sports. Now I prefer cooking, reading and baking. In the future, however, I would like to try hiking in the mountains with friends for a change of pace.

제안: Improve grammar and sentence structure, use linking words and be specific about how the hobby evolved. Avoid vague phrases like 'hopefully it will stay.'

예시: Yes. I have played badminton since childhood, and I have always loved reading as well. I started with fan fiction and manga, but now I read a wide range of genres, and I expect this interest to continue as I get older.

제안: Make the point clearer with correct grammar and concise structure; use a linking phrase and give a brief contrast with an example of how you differ.

예시: Not really. My family enjoys reading, but unlike them I read every day and often buy or download many books. For instance, I usually finish two or three novels a month, whereas they read more occasionally.

× Yes I do, I love reading, especially thriller and mystery books.

✓ Yes, I do. I love reading, especially thriller and mystery books.

The original lacked punctuation between clauses; while not a third-person singular verb error, punctuation is needed. Insert a comma after 'Yes' and separate independent clauses with a period to improve clarity and grammar. Suggestion: use proper sentence boundaries and commas for introductory words.

× I have several books downloaded in my e-reader.

✓ I have several books downloaded on my e-reader.

Incorrect preposition use: 'downloaded in my e-reader' is awkward. Use preposition 'on' for content stored on a device. Also 'have ... downloaded' is acceptable present perfect indicating current state. Suggestion: use 'on' with devices.

× It helps me relax and wind down.

✓ They help me relax and wind down.

Subject-verb agreement error (plural subject): 'books' is plural, so the pronoun referring to them should be 'they' and the verb 'help' (not 'helps'). Change singular 'It helps' to plural 'They help'. Suggestion: ensure pronouns and verbs agree with the antecedent's number.

× Yes, when I was a child a play badminton because my family loves sports, but now I prefer cooking, reading and baking.

✓ Yes. When I was a child, I played badminton because my family loved sports, but now I prefer cooking, reading, and baking.

Multiple errors: 'a play badminton' is incorrect word order and article use — should be 'I played badminton' (past tense). Also tense consistency: 'because my family loves sports' should be 'loved' to match past time reference, or keep 'loves' if family still loves sports; choose past to reflect childhood context. Added commas for clarity and Oxford comma. Suggestion: use past tense 'played' for childhood activities and keep tenses consistent.

× But in the future I would like to try hiking in a mountain with friends.

✓ But in the future I would like to try hiking in a mountain with friends.

Sentence is grammatically acceptable; however 'in a mountain' is awkward. Prefer 'in the mountains' or 'on a mountain'. If referring to a single mountain: 'on a mountain with friends.' Suggestion: use 'in the mountains' for general mountainous areas or 'on a mountain' for a specific peak.

× Yes, not only that I play badminton, I love to read books like fan fiction, manga and now I got to read a lot of books on different genre and hopefully it will stay when I'm much more older.

✓ Yes. Not only did I play badminton, I also love to read books like fan fiction and manga, and now I get to read a lot of books in different genres, and hopefully this will continue when I'm much older.

Multiple issues: tense and auxiliary for past ('did I play' instead of 'I play'), missing 'also', colloquial 'got to' should be 'get to' for present, 'different genre' needs plural 'genres', 'it will stay' is vague — 'this will continue' is clearer, and 'much more older' is ungrammatical; use 'much older' or 'much more mature' but here 'much older' suffices without 'more'. Suggestions: use correct past auxiliary, ensure noun plurals, use 'get to' for present opportunity, and avoid redundant comparative 'more older'.

× I don't think so, that is the same as myself that they love reading books they read but not like me who reads a lot and buy books and download books to read every day.

✓ I don't think so. They also like reading books, but not like me, who reads a lot, buys books, and downloads books to read every day.

Problems: confusing structure and incorrect use of pronouns. 'That is the same as myself' is unnatural; better: 'They also like reading books'. Subject-verb agreement: 'who reads' refers to 'me' so 'reads' is fine, but 'buy books' should be 'buys books' to match 'who'. Added commas for clarity and parallel verb forms in the list. Suggestion: rephrase to a simpler subject-verb structure and keep verbs parallel and agreeing with their subject.