Hobby— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Combine ideas into a single coherent response, use linking words, and avoid repetition. Start with a clear topic sentence naming your main hobbies, then give one specific detail for each. Use natural phrases to connect items (e.g., “I enjoy…; I also like…”).

예시: I have several hobbies. I enjoy gardening because it helps me relax and I grow herbs and tomatoes in my small balcony. I also like reading novels, especially contemporary fiction, and I love travelling to learn about different cultures.

제안: Good structure and detail. To improve, use fewer filler phrases, add a linking phrase to show result or reason, and keep it concise (max 5 sentences). Mentioning one specific memorable example makes it stronger.

예시: Yes. As a child I enjoyed sketching and painting, and I often made birthday cards and framed drawings as gifts. Because I loved colours and portraiture, my family still displays some of my early paintings.

제안: The answer is unclear and contains awkward phrasing. Begin with a clear topic sentence (e.g., “Yes, I have continued one childhood hobby”), then explain how you practise it now and give a specific detail (style, frequency, achievements). Use linking words and correct grammar.

예시: Yes, I have continued one hobby from my childhood: classical dancing. I practise Bharatanatyam twice a week now and have performed at local cultural festivals, which helps me stay connected to my roots.

제안: Organise your answer to compare hobbies clearly and use linking words (e.g., “while”, “however”). Be specific about shared activities and give a brief reason or example for differences. Avoid contradictory or vague phrases like “not my dad”.

예시: Yes, I share some hobbies with my mother: we both enjoy gardening and experimenting with new recipes, and we often try a new dish together at weekends. However, my father prefers watching the news and playing video games, which I don’t really enjoy.

× I like reading books and traveling and exploring cultures.

✓ I like reading books, traveling, and exploring cultures.

Use of the -ing form is correct, but list items should be separated by commas and include a serial (Oxford) comma for clarity. Add commas to improve readability and parallelism.

× During my childhood, I used to do sketching and painting whenever I was free, and I remember I made a couple of drawings and I gifted them to my friends and family on their birthdays or special occasions.

✓ During my childhood, I used to sketch and paint whenever I was free, and I remember making a couple of drawings that I gave to my friends and family on their birthdays or special occasions.

'Used to do sketching and painting' is wordy; use 'used to sketch and paint' for natural past habitual action. After 'remember', use the -ing form ('making') when recalling a past action. 'Gifted them to' is acceptable but 'gave to' is more natural in this context.

× Such a question.

✓ That's an interesting question.

'Such a question' is a fragment and not a complete sentence (no verb). Replace with a complete sentence that fits the conversational context, e.g., 'That's an interesting question.'

× The one hobby of my dancing that I still pursue, and I am a classical dancer.

✓ One hobby I still pursue is dancing; I am a classical dancer.

Original sentence has incorrect structure and unnecessary possessive 'of my dancing'. Use a clear subject-verb structure: 'One hobby I still pursue is dancing.' Combine with the following clause for fluency.

× Yes, my mother has a hobby of trying new dishes and gardening, which I think I'm also interested in, but not my dad.

✓ Yes, my mother enjoys trying new dishes and gardening, which I am also interested in, but not my dad.

'Has a hobby of' is awkward; use 'enjoys' for natural expression. 'Which I think I'm also interested in' mixes tenses and is wordy; use 'which I am also interested in.' Also 'but not my dad' is a sentence fragment; kept but clarified in corrected sentence.

× My dad loves to watch news and play games, but I'm not interested in sports.

✓ My dad loves watching the news and playing games, but I'm not interested in sports.

Parallel gerunds improve fluency: 'loves watching the news and playing games.' Add definite article 'the' before 'news' as is idiomatic. The rest is fine.