Hobby— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Reduce hesitation and repetitive filler words, use a clear topic sentence and one or two specific supporting details with linking words. Keep the answer within 3–4 sentences and correct minor grammar (e.g., 'different kinds of hobbies', 'medical reports').

예시: My favorite hobby is reading medical journals and clinical case studies. This keeps my knowledge up to date, and because I work in the medical field, it helps me apply new findings to my practice. For example, I recently read a case study on infection control that changed how I manage patient follow-up.

제안: Organize your answer with a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition and filler sounds, and correct vocabulary and grammar ('I won many prizes', 'drawing and painting competitions'). Provide one specific example or memory to make it vivid.

예시: Yes. As a child I loved drawing and painting, and I won several prizes in school art competitions. I remember creating a watercolor of my neighborhood that was displayed in the school hall, which made me very proud.

제안: Give a clear direct answer first, then explain briefly with linking words (e.g., 'but', 'so') and specific reasons. Avoid contradictions and tense errors ('I left' → 'I left my childhood hobby' or 'I have left'). Keep it concise (2–3 sentences).

예시: No, I no longer keep that hobby. I used to paint a lot, but now I prefer reading medical journals because they are more relevant to my career and help me stay informed.

제안: Answer directly, use more natural phrasing and limit fillers. Give one or two specific contrasts and a brief reason for the difference. Use linking words like 'whereas' or 'while' to make the comparison coherent.

예시: No, my hobbies are different from my family's. While they enjoy going on picnics and trying new restaurants, I prefer staying at home reading novels and medical articles because I find it relaxing and professionally useful.

× Yes, I have different kind of hobbies, but my favorite one is uh, reading a medical journal, clinical case studies and medical report reporting.

✓ Yes, I have different kinds of hobbies, but my favorite is reading medical journals, clinical case studies, and medical reports.

'Different kind' should be 'different kinds' (plural) because 'hobbies' is plural; this is a quantifier/number agreement issue. Use plural forms 'journals' and 'reports' to match general habitual activities. Remove redundant 'one' after 'favorite' and the duplicated 'reporting' for clarity.

× Because I feel like when I read these kinds of things as a hobby then it makes more up to date my knowledge and uh, uh, as from medical field, it helped me a lot.

✓ Because I feel that when I read these kinds of things as a hobby, it keeps my knowledge up to date, and as a result in the medical field it has helped me a lot.

Mixed tense and awkward word order. Use present simple 'keeps' for habitual effect and 'has helped' for past effects continuing to present. Place 'up to date' after 'keeps my knowledge' for natural English word order.

× Yes, I remember as a child, I was very fond of painting and kind of, uh, drank, uh, even I want many kind of for prizes in, uh, drying and painting competitions.

✓ Yes, I remember that as a child I was very fond of painting and I even won many prizes in drawing and painting competitions.

'Drank' is incorrect verb here; likely intended 'won'. Use simple past 'won' for past events. 'Drying' is a misspelling of 'drawing'. Remove filler words and correct word order: 'I remember that as a child I was...'.

× So as a child, uh, so when I was a child, my uh, most favorite hobbies was drawing.

✓ So as a child, my most favorite hobby was drawing.

Subject-verb agreement: 'hobbies was' is wrong. Use singular 'hobby' with singular verb 'was' or plural 'hobbies were'. Also 'most favorite' is redundant; 'favorite' suffices, but 'most favorite' may be accepted conversationally; simplified to 'my favorite hobby'.

× As a child I was very fond of drawing and painting, but now uh, I feel like I kind of more of reading person now.

✓ As a child I was very fond of drawing and painting, but now I consider myself more of a reader.

Awkward phrasing and repetition of 'now'. Use 'consider myself' and noun 'reader' to express preference. Maintain present simple for current state.

× So no, I left my childhood hobby and start new hobby and I'm a different person now.

✓ So no, I left my childhood hobby and started a new one; I'm a different person now.

Tense consistency: use past 'left' and past 'started' for completed actions. 'Start' should be 'started'. Use 'a new one' to avoid repetition.

× No, I'm totally different kind of person, uh, from my family members.

✓ No, I'm a totally different kind of person from my family members.

Missing article 'a' before 'totally different kind of person'. Pronoun/article error; add 'a' for grammatical noun phrase.

× My family members are more like, uh, go to picnic and explore the, uh, city or they are more into eating and anything like that.

✓ My family members prefer going on picnics and exploring the city, or they are more into eating out and similar activities.

Use gerund forms after 'prefer' and 'into' ('going', 'exploring', 'eating out'). 'Go to picnic' is incorrect collocation; use 'going on picnics'. Clarify 'eating out' and 'similar activities' for natural phrasing.

× But I'm more like, uh, stay at home and reading novels, articles and medical journals.

✓ But I prefer staying at home and reading novels, articles, and medical journals.

Use parallel gerunds 'staying' and 'reading' for grammatical parallel structure. 'More like' is conversational and ungrammatical here; 'prefer' is clearer.