Hobby— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more natural and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid repetition and grammar mistakes (e.g., use ‘exercise’ as a noun phrase and correct verb forms).

예시: Yes, I have several hobbies, including writing, drawing, and exercising. For example, I often exercise and write with friends after school, which helps me relax and feel more energetic.

제안: Give a clear direct answer, then explain with specific details and correct grammar. Use linking words to connect ideas (for example, 'because' or 'so'). Avoid unclear phrases like 'love to join and jogging'.

예시: Yes, I did. As a child I enjoyed jogging and drawing because drawing helped me relax and jogging kept me healthy. Also, I often drew with friends, which helped me build good relationships.

제안: Start with a concise topic sentence stating the hobby, then give two specific reasons why you kept it, using correct tenses and linking words (for example, 'because' and 'so'). Reduce repetition and fix grammar (e.g., 'drawing makes me', 'good relationships').

예시: Yes — I have drawn since I was a child. Drawing makes me happy and stimulates my imagination, and because my friends also enjoy drawing, it helped me form close friendships.

제안: Answer directly, then give specific examples and use natural phrases (e.g., 'my family and I watch movies and cook together'). Use linking words to explain why these activities matter and correct grammar (e.g., 'watching movies', 'it makes me happy').

예시: Yes, definitely. My family and I often watch movies and cook together, which brings us closer. For example, we usually prepare dinner together on weekends and then watch a film, and those moments make me very happy.

× Yes, I have several hobbies such as writing, drawing, exercise.

✓ Yes, I have several hobbies such as writing, drawing, and exercising.

The noun 'exercise' in the list is inconsistent with the gerund forms 'writing' and 'drawing'. Use the gerund 'exercising' to match the parallel structure and indicate the activity. Also add 'and' before the last item in a list for clarity.

× For instance, I work with my friends every day.

✓ For instance, I practice with my friends every day.

The verb 'work' is grammatical but sounds odd for hobbies like drawing or writing. 'Practice' or 'work with' could be used; 'practice' better fits repeated hobby activity. Use present tense 'practice' to match 'every day'.

× Hobbies make me relax and make me energetic.

✓ Hobbies relax me and make me energetic.

Use the verb 'relax' with object 'me' rather than 'make me relax' which is possible but less natural here. 'Make me energetic' is fine; reordering improves clarity and naturalness.

× Yes I did when I was young.

✓ Yes, I did when I was young.

Add a comma after 'Yes' for correct punctuation in speech transcription. The sentence is otherwise grammatically correct.

× I love to join and jogging because drawing is make me relax and make me have good relationship with my friends.

✓ I loved joining and jogging because drawing made me relaxed and helped me have good relationships with my friends.

Multiple issues: 'love to join and jogging' mixes infinitive and gerund; use parallel gerunds 'joining and jogging'. Tense should be past ('loved'/'made') because question asked about childhood. 'Drawing is make me relax' is incorrect: use past 'made me relaxed' or 'helped me relax'. 'Have good relationship' needs plural 'relationships' or 'a good relationship' and 'with my friends' remains. Overall adjust verbs to past tense and use gerunds consistently.

× Yes, I have a hobby when I was young.

✓ Yes, I had a hobby when I was young.

The clause refers to the past, so use past tense 'had' rather than present 'have'. Matching tense maintains temporal consistency.

× I think drawing is make me happy and make me open my imagination.

✓ I think drawing makes me happy and opens my imagination.

Use third-person singular present 'makes' and 'opens' to agree with singular subject 'drawing'. Replace 'is make' with 'makes', and 'open my imagination' with 'opens my imagination' for subject-verb agreement and natural phrasing.

× And I think drawing made me make a good relationships with my friend because my friend love drawing too.

✓ I think drawing helped me build good relationships with my friends because my friends love drawing too.

Several corrections: use 'helped me build' rather than 'made me make'; 'relationships' should be plural to match 'friends'; 'my friend' should be 'my friends'; 'love' must be 'love' or 'loved' depending on tense—here present 'love' is acceptable if talking generally, so make 'friends' plural. This fixes clarity and grammar.

× Yes absolutely. I and my family have watching movie together and cooking together.

✓ Yes, absolutely. My family and I watch movies together and cook together.

Use the polite order 'My family and I' not 'I and my family'. 'Have watching movie' is incorrect: use present tense 'watch' and plural 'movies' or 'a movie'. Similarly use 'cook' rather than 'cooking' to match parallel verbs.

× When we join together it's made me happy and make me enjoy that moment.

✓ When we get together, it makes me happy and helps me enjoy the moment.

'Join together' is awkward; 'get together' is natural. Use present tense 'makes' and 'helps' to agree with singular 'it' (the act of getting together). 'Enjoy that moment' is better as 'enjoy the moment' for natural phrasing.

× I love my family.

✓ I love my family.

This sentence is correct. No grammatical change needed.