Shoes— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: أعد صياغة إجابتك لتكون أوضح وأكثر ترابطًا وحدد وتجنب التكرار. استخدم جملة افتتاحية واضحة ثم أضف تفاصيل محددة عن التكرار (مثلاً: مرة في الشهر أو عند استلام الراتب). حاول استخدام كلمات ربط بسيطة ولا تتجاوز خمس جمل. كما انتبه للنطق والوقفات الطويلة.

예시: Yes, I enjoy buying shoes. I usually buy new shoes when I get my salary, about once a month. I prefer to shop for them in person so I can try them on, but sometimes I browse online first.

제안: جهّز إجابة مباشرة وواضحة: ابدأ بجملة تؤكد التجربة ثم قدّم تفاصيل محددة عن كيفية الشراء (مثلاً: أقيس المقاس وأقرأ التعليقات). استخدم ربطاً منطقياً بين الأفكار وتجنب التلميحات الغامضة. درّب على النطق وعبارات متكررة مثل "I often buy" أو "I usually check".

예시: Yes, I have bought shoes online several times. I always check the size guide and read customer reviews before ordering. It’s convenient and often cheaper, but I make sure the return policy is clear.

제안: قدّم رقمًا أو نطاقًا واضحًا بدل الإجابات المبهمة، وابدأ بجملة موضوعية تشرح عادة الإنفاق ثم اذكر سبب هذا المبلغ. تجنّب التردد والكلمات الحشو ودرّب الإجابة مسبقًا لتكون مختصرة ومحددة ضمن خمس جمل. مثلاً قل: "أصرف كذا في السنة" أو "أصرف بين X وY لكل زوج".

예시: I don’t spend a lot on shoes. Usually I spend around $30 to $50 per pair because I buy basic, comfortable styles. Occasionally I’ll spend more for special occasions.

제안: ابدأ بإجابة واضحة ومباشرة ثم اذكر أسباب محددة تدعم موقفك واستخدم أمثلة قصيرة. ربط الأسباب بكلمات مثل "because" أو "so" يساعد على التماسك. حاول تقليل الترديد وتحسين الانسياب واستخدم تعابير مناسبة لوصف الراحة مثل "supportive" أو "cushioned".

예시: I prefer comfortable shoes rather than fashionable ones. I like flat, supportive shoes because they’re easy to walk and run in all day. For example, I often choose sneakers when I’m going out for errands.

× Actually I like to buy buy shoes from time to time especially when get my salary.

✓ Actually I like to buy shoes from time to time, especially when I get my salary.

The sentence misses the subject before the verb 'get' and has a repeated word 'buy'. Add the subject 'I' before 'get' and remove the duplicated 'buy' to make the sentence grammatically correct and clear. Also add a comma before the clause 'especially when I get my salary' for better readability.

× Sometime I am buying in one month at 22 besides.

✓ Sometimes I buy them on the 22nd of the month.

Use simple present 'buy' for habitual actions rather than present continuous 'am buying'. Use 'sometimes' (adverb) and specify the date as 'the 22nd of the month'. 'Besides' is unnecessary and removed for clarity.

× Absolutely yes I should many of time to to buy from online just check my size and give my number of the feet.

✓ Absolutely yes, I have bought many times online; I just check my size and the measurements of my feet.

The original mixes modal/auxiliary 'should' incorrectly with time expression. Use present perfect 'have bought' for experiences up to now. 'Many of time' should be 'many times'. 'Give my number of the feet' is unclear; use 'measurements of my feet' or 'my foot measurements'. Also remove duplicate 'to'.

× So it is very interesting to try buying from the online.

✓ So it is very interesting to try buying online.

The definite article 'the' before 'online' is incorrect. 'Online' is used as an adverb here, so omit the article: 'buying online'.

× Not too much about, uh, it's a little bit too to, to keep, uh, some money for, uh, for my, uh, shoes.

✓ I don't spend too much; I save a little money for shoes.

The original is fragmented and repetitive. Reconstruct the idea using clear subject-verb structure: 'I don't spend too much' and 'I save a little money for shoes.' This fixes sentence fragments and redundancy.

× Uh, not it's my the tip, umm, order, but just when I want to need to buy it.

✓ It's not a priority; I only buy shoes when I need them.

The original is unclear and ungrammatical. Replace with a concise sentence expressing the intended meaning. Use 'It's not a priority' and 'when I need them' for clarity and correct pronoun agreement.

× In my opinion, I prefer to to wearing uh, comfortable shoes.

✓ In my opinion, I prefer wearing comfortable shoes.

After 'prefer' use the gerund 'wearing' or the infinitive without 'to' as 'prefer to wear'. The original incorrectly has 'to wearing' (mix of to + gerund). Remove duplicate 'to' and 'uh' fillers.

× It's like flat shoes because it is very calm and very relaxing too When when I use it for example, I can walk and run every places.

✓ I like flats because they are very comfortable and relaxing; for example, I can walk and run everywhere in them.

'Calm' is incorrect to describe shoes; use 'comfortable'. 'Flat shoes' can be shortened to 'flats'. Ensure subject-verb agreement ('they are'). 'Every places' is ungrammatical; use 'everywhere'. Also remove duplicate 'when' and add punctuation for clarity.