Shoes— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and coherent: state directly whether you like buying shoes and how often, then give one brief reason. Avoid contradictory phrases and hesitations. Use one or two linking words to connect ideas.

예시: I enjoy buying shoes occasionally; I usually buy two or three pairs a year because I only replace them when the old ones wear out.

제안: Give a clear topic sentence, then add specific reasons with linking words. Reduce fillers (‘uh’, ‘like’) and correct small grammar errors (e.g. 'especially').

예시: No, I haven't bought shoes online because I prefer trying them on in person; that way I can check the fit, comfort and size before I buy.

제안: Answer the question directly with a clear amount, then justify it briefly. Avoid unclear phrases ('use this pen') and keep sentences short. Mention a typical price range and reason for it.

예시: I usually spend around $80 to $120 on a pair of shoes because I prefer buying durable, comfortable brands like Nike that last longer.

제안: Start with a direct statement of preference, then give a specific reason with linking words. Remove hesitations and correct grammar (e.g. 'I go for', 'it doesn't matter', 'comfortable shoes').

예시: I prefer comfortable shoes because I spend about eight hours a day at work, so I need footwear that provides good support and prevents fatigue.

× Yes, I like buying shoes but I don't really.

✓ Yes, I like buying shoes, but I don't really buy them often.

The original sentence omits the verb 'buy' after 'don't really,' causing a sentence structure and present tense clarity issue. Adding 'buy them often' completes the idea and matches present simple tense for habits. Suggestion: include the main verb after negation and use adverb of frequency for clarity.

× I'm not fond of shoes but yeah I I buy like 2 to 3 pairs a year.

✓ I'm not fond of shoes, but I buy about two to three pairs a year.

Using numerals and 'like' conversational filler is informal; more importantly, '2 to 3 pairs' is acceptable but writing 'two to three pairs' is clearer. Remove duplicated 'I' and unnecessary filler. This addresses numeral formatting and punctuation; the noun 'pairs' correctly remains plural.

× No, I don't trust online shopping in specially about shoes or clothes.

✓ No, I don't trust online shopping, especially for shoes or clothes.

The word 'specially' is incorrect; 'especially' should be used. The preposition 'for' is more appropriate than 'about' here (preposition error combined with word choice). Also remove 'in'. This corrects modality of expression about preference.

× Uh like I like to shop them in person, like in shop as I can wear them and I can feel the comfort level.

✓ I prefer to try them on in person, at a store, so I can wear them and feel how comfortable they are.

Original uses incorrect object pronoun 'shop them' and awkward phrase 'in shop as.' Use 'try them on' and 'at a store' which correctly use verbs and prepositions. Change 'feel the comfort level' to 'feel how comfortable they are' for natural pronoun reference and adjective use.

× So I use this pen around $100.

✓ So I usually spend around $100 on them.

'Use this pen' is incorrect and likely a slip; needs verb 'spend' to talk about money. 'Usually spend around $100 on them' uses correct present simple for habitual action and correct verb choice. This fixes incorrect verb usage and object reference.

× I'm a person who go with comfortable shoes.

✓ I'm a person who goes for comfortable shoes.

The clause 'who go' refers to 'I' (third person relative clause takes third-person singular), so the verb should be 'goes.' Also, 'go with' is better as 'go for' when expressing preference. This fixes subject-verb agreement and verb choice.

× Uh even its clothes or shoes doesn't matter.

✓ Even if it's clothes or shoes, it doesn't matter to me.

Original uses 'its' incorrectly and has wrong verb agreement 'doesn't' linked to plural idea. Use 'if it's' for conditional, 'it doesn't matter to me' clarifies and corrects pronoun and agreement.

× I am a person who likes to buy comfortable things for me because umm like I spent 8 hours a day at work so I need a comfortable shoes to stand.

✓ I like to buy comfortable things because I spend eight hours a day at work, so I need comfortable shoes to stand in.

Multiple issues: 'I am a person who likes to buy' is wordy—simplified to 'I like to buy.' 'I spent' should be present 'I spend' for habitual action. Write numbers in words for style. 'a comfortable shoes' mixes singular article with plural noun; remove 'a' and use plural 'comfortable shoes.' Add 'to stand in' for clarity. This addresses tense, article, and number agreement.