Singing— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Answer directly at the beginning instead of making a general claim about everyone. Avoid repeating “feeling” and combine the ideas more naturally. Use a clear reason and a specific example, such as singing along to music at home. “When I’m alone or listening to music alone” is repetitive; say “when I’m by myself” instead.

예시: Yes, I do, especially when I’m by myself. I’m not confident enough to sing in front of other people, but I often sing along to music at home. It helps me relax and puts me in a better mood.

제안: The answer contains several ideas in one long sentence, which makes it less clear and less natural. “I didn’t have the voice for that” is understandable, but “I didn’t think I had a good singing voice” is more natural. Organize the response into a direct answer, a school experience, and a reason why you enjoyed it. Use linking words such as “however” and “although.”

예시: No, I’ve never taken formal singing lessons because I didn’t think I had a very good singing voice. However, I did sing in my school choir as part of our music classes. I really enjoyed it because the combined sound of many voices was beautiful.

제안: The main idea is clear, but “if I had to pinpoint some person” and “I would definitely say it or would be my mother” are unnatural and confusing. Say “If I had to choose someone, it would be my mother.” Add a specific reason, such as her encouragement or the fact that she would not judge you. Avoid repeating “sing for” several times.

예시: I usually prefer singing alone because I feel nervous about my voice. However, if I had to choose someone, it would be my mother. She has always encouraged me, and I know she would listen patiently even if I made a few mistakes.

제안: You give a relevant opinion and explain how singing expresses emotions, but there is a grammatical error in “It you can show”; use “Through singing, people can show...” instead. “Happiness and lightness” is slightly unnatural in this context; “joy and emotional relief” or “a sense of lightness” would be better. Avoid repeating “emotions” and support the idea with a concrete example.

예시: Yes, definitely. Singing can make people happier because it allows them to express emotions such as joy, sadness, or frustration. For example, people often sing with friends at parties or listen to music when they need emotional comfort. As a result, singing can create a sense of connection and relief.

제안: “Stringers” should be “singers,” and “makes my nerves cool” is not a natural expression; say “calms my nerves.” The response would be clearer if you separated your preference for singers from your preference for concerts. Remember that “melodies” is plural, so use “that help my mood,” or more naturally, “that improve my mood.”

예시: Yes, I enjoy listening to talented singers because their voices calm me down. I sometimes go to concerts, but I prefer intimate performances with slow songs and gentle melodies rather than loud, upbeat shows. This kind of music helps me relax and improves my mood.

제안: The answer is relevant and includes a personal detail, but it repeats “school” and “we sang” several times. “Mandatory by our school” is unnatural; use “required by my school” or “compulsory at my school.” Divide the long sentence and explain more naturally why singing in a choir was enjoyable.

예시: I haven’t taken formal singing lessons outside school. However, singing was a compulsory part of our music classes, so I joined the school choir. We performed several songs together, and I enjoyed it because the combined sound of the choir was powerful and harmonious.

× I believe that everyone likes singing a little bit as it is a very good feeling, it is a happy feeling.

✓ I believe that everyone likes singing a little bit because it feels good and makes people happy.

The original sentence joins several complete ideas with commas, creating a comma splice. Use a conjunction such as because to connect the ideas more clearly and naturally.

× No, I knew I didn't have the voice for that, so I did not properly learn how to sing.

✓ No, I knew I didn't have a voice for that, so I did not properly learn how to sing.

The noun voice is being used in a general sense, so the indefinite article a is more appropriate than the definite article the.

× I generally do not have anyone that I want to sing for because I am nervous about my singing. I usually like to sing alone, but if I had to pinpoint some person who I had to sing for, I would definitely say it or would be my mother because I love her dearly.

✓ I generally do not have anyone I want to sing for because I am nervous about my singing. I usually like to sing alone, but if I had to name someone I would sing for, it would definitely be my mother because I love her dearly.

The phrase would definitely say it or would be my mother is structurally incorrect and does not clearly express the intended meaning. Use the conditional structure if I had to..., it would be... to identify the person.

× I generally do not have anyone that I want to sing for because I am nervous about my singing. I usually like to sing alone, but if I had to pinpoint some person who I had to sing for, I would definitely say it or would be my mother because I love her dearly.

✓ I generally do not have anyone I want to sing for because I am nervous about my singing. I usually like to sing alone, but if I had to name someone I would sing for, it would definitely be my mother because I love her dearly.

The pronoun it does not refer clearly to a person. Replace it with the person being discussed, or use the structure it would be my mother, where it functions as a grammatical subject and my mother provides the identification.

× Yes, definitely. Singing is one of the very creative art forms that lets a person show their emotions clearly. It you can show a lot of your emotions, happiness, sadness through singing.

✓ Yes, definitely. Singing is one of the most creative art forms and lets people show their emotions clearly. You can show many emotions, such as happiness and sadness, through singing.

The phrase It you can show is not a complete or correctly formed sentence. Begin with You can show. The revised version also connects the ideas more smoothly.

× Singing is one of the very creative art forms that lets a person show their emotions clearly.

✓ Singing is one of the most creative art forms and lets people show their emotions clearly.

After one of the, use a superlative adjective when identifying something as part of a top group. Therefore, most creative is more appropriate than very creative in this structure.

× Yes, I do like listening to good stringers, it makes my mind calm, it makes my nerves cool and I like to go to concerts also but not many upbeat concerts.

✓ Yes, I like listening to good singers because it calms my mind and soothes my nerves. I also like going to concerts, but not to many upbeat concerts.

The original sentence contains comma splices because several independent clauses are joined only by commas. Separate the ideas into two sentences and use because to show the relationship between listening and its effects.

× I like to go to concerts with slow songs or light melodies that helps my mood and lightens my day.

✓ I like to go to concerts with slow songs or light melodies that help my mood and lighten my day.

The relative pronoun that refers to the plural noun songs or melodies, so the verbs must be plural: help and lighten, not helps and lightens.

× I have not taken a proper singing class outside of my school but we had singing classes in my school as they were mandatory by our school and we sang in a choir, we sang many melodies together and it was fun because I really love a choir's voice.

✓ I have not taken a proper singing class outside of my school, but we had singing classes at my school because they were mandatory there. We sang in a choir and sang many melodies together, which was fun because I really love the sound of a choir.

Use at my school when referring to the place or institution where the classes took place. The preposition by does not correctly express this meaning.