Singing— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and natural. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific reasons with linking words. Avoid redundancy and awkward phrases like "one of my specialties that I have within myself."

예시: Yes, I enjoy singing. It relaxes me after a stressful day and lets me share my talent with friends — for example, I often sing at small gatherings to make people smile.

제안: Clarify the relationship and tense. Use a clear topic sentence, then give specific details (age, what you learned, how you practised). Use linking words to connect ideas.

예시: Yes. My mother, who is a music teacher, started teaching me when I was six. Since then I’ve practised regularly and watched her teach other students, which helped me learn proper techniques.

제안: Be direct and avoid repetition. Say who you would sing for and give one short reason or a brief example. Remove unclear fragments and finish sentences cleanly.

예시: I would like to sing for my future partner because singing a love song feels personal and romantic. For example, I imagine singing a simple acoustic song at a quiet dinner to express my feelings.

제안: Start with a clear opinion, then give specific examples and use linking words correctly. Avoid repetition like "if you are if you feel" and aim for concise phrasing.

예시: Yes, I think singing brings happiness because songs match our emotions. For example, when I’m sad I listen to ballads, but when I want to celebrate I choose upbeat pop songs — music helps me process my feelings.

제안: Use correct grammar and clear vocabulary. Begin with a direct statement, then give a specific example and explain why you enjoy them. Replace awkward phrases like "sweet my taste."

예시: Yes, I enjoy listening to other singers. For example, I’m a big fan of a K-pop group called Cortis because their harmonies and vocal tone suit my taste and cheer me up.

제안: Use past or present simple correctly and finish your thoughts. Give one or two specific alternatives to formal classes and explain briefly how they help you improve.

예시: No, I haven’t taken formal classes because my mother advised against pursuing singing as a career. Instead, I learn from YouTube tutorials and feedback from friends, which has helped me improve my pitch and breathing technique.

× I do love to sing a lot as I believe that singing is one of my specialties that I have within myself and the reason why I sing is because it helps me to relax my mind and also to showcase my talent to people especially my friends.

✓ I really love to sing because I believe singing is one of my special talents, and I sing to relax my mind and to showcase my talent to people, especially my friends.

The sentence uses awkward adjective/adverb phrases ('do love to sing a lot', 'specialties that I have within myself') and redundant connectors. Replace 'do love to sing a lot' with 'really love to sing' (adverb placement and natural phrasing). Use 'special talents' instead of 'specialties that I have within myself' (concise adjective use). Remove redundant 'the reason why' and 'is because' by using 'and I sing to...'. This improves adjective/adverb usage and overall clarity.

× I did my mom as a music teacher until now and she taught me on how to sing when I was six years old and I also watched her teaching others on how to sing with good methods.

✓ My mom has been my music teacher until now; she taught me how to sing when I was six years old, and I also watched her teach others effective methods.

The original mixes simple past and incorrect verbs ('I did my mom as a music teacher', 'taught me on how to sing'). Use present perfect 'has been' to indicate an action continuing until now. Replace 'did my mom as' with 'my mom has been my music teacher'. Use 'taught me how to sing' (correct verb pattern) and 'watched her teach' (bare infinitive after 'watch'). Fixs improve tense consistency and verb usage.

× I want to showcase my talent to my future soulmate in the future because I believe that I should show this the version of me singing a love song for him and for me.

✓ I want to showcase my talent to my future soulmate because I want to show this side of myself by singing a love song for them and for myself.

Redundant phrase 'in the future' repeated and awkward structure 'show this the version of me'. Remove redundancy and reorder to 'show this side of myself'. Use gender-neutral 'them' to avoid awkward phrasing. This corrects sentence structure and clarity.

× If someone sings to me, I will appreciate and feel that it was such. It is such an.

✓ If someone sings to me, I will appreciate it and feel that it was very meaningful.

Original contains unfinished and unclear fragments ('it was such. It is such an.'). Replace with a complete and clear clause 'I will appreciate it and feel that it was very meaningful.' This fixes sentence fragments and unclear structure.

× It is because these days most of the songs relate to how people feel at the moment.

✓ This is because these days most songs relate to how people feel in the moment.

Use 'This is because' instead of 'It is because' for clearer reference to previous question. 'Most of the songs' is wordy; 'most songs' is more natural. 'At the moment' can be replaced with 'in the moment' to match idiomatic usage. These adjustments improve present-tense usage and natural phrasing.

× For example, if you are feeling sad then you can listen to ballad songs and if you are if you feel happy then you can listen to upbeat songs.

✓ For example, if you are feeling sad you can listen to ballads, and if you feel happy you can listen to upbeat songs.

Original repeats 'if you are' and uses 'ballad songs' (awkward). Remove repetition and use plural 'ballads'. Keep parallel structure in conditional clauses for clarity.

× I love to because now I am a fan of Cortis, one of the K pop groups in the South Korea.

✓ I love to, because I am now a fan of Cortis, one of the K-pop groups in South Korea.

Fix pronoun/phrase placement by adding a comma and completing 'I love to' with context. 'the South Korea' is incorrect; use 'South Korea' without 'the'. Also hyphenate 'K-pop'. This corrects pronoun/reference and country name usage.

× I love to hear them singing and I feel that their voices really sweet my taste.

✓ I love to hear them sing, and I feel that their voices really suit my taste.

Use the bare infinitive 'hear them sing' after 'hear'. 'Sweet my taste' is incorrect adjective/adverb usage; use the verb 'suit' to express compatibility with taste. This corrects adjective/adverb misuse.

× I don't because my mom prevents me from doing so.

✓ I haven't, because my mom prevents me from doing so.

Question was 'Have you ever taken a singing class?' so the correct response should use present perfect 'I haven't' rather than simple present 'I don't'. This aligns tense with the question.

× She said that choosing singing as a career will lead me to downfalls.

✓ She said that choosing singing as a career would lead me to downfalls.

When reporting speech about the future in the past, backshift 'will' to 'would'. This corrects reported speech structure. Note 'downfalls' is plural but acceptable; consider 'downfall' or 'hardship' for naturalness.

× So instead I love singing by watching videos on YouTube on how to improve my tune and also I listen and seek advices from.

✓ So instead I practice singing by watching videos on YouTube about how to improve my pitch, and I also listen for and seek advice from others.

Use 'practice singing' rather than 'love singing by' to indicate method. 'on how to' should be 'about how to' or 'on improving'. 'Tune' is better as 'pitch' in this context. Use 'seek advice' (uncountable) not 'seek advices'. Add 'from others' to complete the phrase. Corrects gerund usage and noun forms.