Hometown— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence naming the place, then give one or two specific, relevant details. Avoid fillers (“umm”) and repetition; correct prepositions and article use (e.g., “in the Ural Mountains”).

예시: I was born in Perm, a city in the Ural Mountains of Russia. It dates back to the 18th century and locals are proud of its industrial and cultural history.

제안: Answer directly with one clear reason, then give a specific example with correct names and brief details. Use linking words (for example, for instance) properly and avoid incorrect or unclear references (e.g., check the restaurant name).

예시: I like the variety of restaurants in my hometown, which offer many international cuisines. For example, there is a popular Asian restaurant near my house that serves traditional dishes like sushi and ramen.

제안: Give a clear, direct answer stating the duration and simplify phrasing. Use a topic sentence like “I have lived there all my life,” then add one short supporting detail if necessary. Avoid uncertain words like “suppose.”

예시: I have lived in Perm all my life — I was born there and still live with my parents.

제안: State your opinion clearly and support it with specific, relevant reasons. Use linking words (because, for example) and avoid fillers. If mentioning events, give concise details and correct tense/use of dates.

예시: Yes, I think it is a great place for young people because the city hosts large youth festivals and concerts. For example, in 2025 it held a city-wide youth festival with music events and workshops that attracted many young visitors.

× I was born in Perman, Russia. It is a city which located in the the Ural Mountain. It's a city of umm 18th century and our citizens proud to be permanent people.

✓ I was born in Perm, Russia. It is a city which is located in the Ural Mountains. It is a city from the 18th century and our citizens are proud to be Permian.

Multiple sentence structure problems: missing verb 'is' after 'which' (relative clause), incorrect article and plural for 'Ural Mountains', awkward phrasing 'a city of 18th century' should be 'a city from the 18th century', and missing verb 'are' in 'our citizens proud'. Also 'Perman' is likely the wrong spelling; correct is 'Perm', and demonym 'Permian' is more natural than 'permanent people'. Suggestion: add required verbs, correct place names and articles, and choose natural demonym words. Grammar problem type ID:26

× It is a city which located in the the Ural Mountain.

✓ It is a city which is located in the Ural Mountains.

The sentence omits the auxiliary verb 'is' in the relative clause and uses incorrect article and number for 'Ural Mountain'. The correct phrase is 'the Ural Mountains' (plural) and you must include 'is' for 'which is located'. Suggestion: use 'which is located in the Ural Mountains' or more naturally 'which is located in the Ural Mountains.' Grammar problem type ID:11

× It is a city which located in the the Ural Mountain.

✓ It is a city which is located in the Ural Mountains.

The phrase used 'the the' (duplicate article) and 'Ural Mountain' is singular; standard English uses 'the Ural Mountains'. Remove duplicate 'the' and use the plural. Suggestion: proofread for duplicate words and use correct geographical names. Grammar problem type ID:22

× It's a city of umm 18th century and our citizens proud to be permanent people.

✓ It is a city from the 18th century and our citizens are proud to be Permians.

The sentence lacks the verb 'are' for the present state ('our citizens are proud') and uses 'of 18th century' which is incorrect preposition/structure; use 'from the 18th century'. 'Permanent people' is wrong word choice; use the demonym 'Permians'. Suggestion: include the auxiliary verb for present tense, use 'from the 18th century', and replace incorrect noun with the correct demonym. Grammar problem type ID:6

× For instance, I like Pokémon. It is a restaurant with an Asian traditional food.

✓ For instance, I like Pokmon. It is a restaurant that serves traditional Asian food.

'Asian traditional food' is awkward word order; correct is 'traditional Asian food' or 'Asian traditional cuisine'. Also use 'serves' to describe what a restaurant provides. Suggestion: reorder adjectives and use the verb 'serve' for restaurants. Grammar problem type ID:13

× It is a restaurant with an Asian traditional food.

✓ It is a restaurant that serves traditional Asian food.

'Food' is uncountable so 'an' should not be used. The phrase 'an Asian traditional food' incorrectly combines an article with uncountable noun. Suggestion: remove 'an' and rephrase as 'serves traditional Asian food'. Grammar problem type ID:1

× So I was born there. So I suppose from my birth now I live with my parents.

✓ I was born there, and I have lived with my parents since birth.

The sentence mixes simple past 'I was born' with present simple 'I live' and an incorrect time expression 'from my birth now'. Use present perfect 'have lived' with 'since birth' to indicate an action continuing from the past to the present. Suggestion: use 'I have lived with my parents since I was born' or 'since birth'. Grammar problem type ID:6

× I believe that yes, because, umm, in 2025 our city was a capital of young adults and there was a big, uh, festival of them, a concert and many events.

✓ I believe so, because in 2025 our city was the capital for young adults and there was a big festival for them, with a concert and many events.

Use 'I believe so' rather than 'I believe that yes'. 'Was a capital' should be 'was the capital' if referring to a specific title. 'Festival of them' is awkward; use 'festival for them'. Also keep past tense consistent: 'was' and 'there was' are fine for a past event. Suggestion: use 'the capital for young adults' and 'a festival for them, with a concert and many events.' Grammar problem type ID:5

× So.

✓ (omit fragment or connect to previous sentence: '...and many events.')

A single conjunction 'So.' is a fragment and does not add meaning. It is better to finish the thought in the previous sentence or remove this fragment. Suggestion: avoid sentence fragments and ensure complete sentences with subject and verb. Grammar problem type ID:16