Work— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and organize information with a clear topic sentence and supporting details. Start with a direct answer, then give brief relevant background and a clear future plan. Reduce hesitation and filler words.

예시: I'm currently working in my family's business. I graduated in aerospace engineering two years ago, and I plan to start a master's in management in Germany next year.

제안: Give a clear, structured response: state the nature of the business, your role or working hours, and a specific detail about what the company does. Avoid repetition and vague phrases like "we are everywhere."

예시: I work in my family's import-export business. I usually work every day and on weekends because it's a small company, and we mainly export and import fruit and vegetables to several countries in the region.

제안: Respond directly with one clear reason, then add a specific supporting detail using a linking word. Avoid hesitations and incomplete sentences.

예시: Yes, it's a good place to work because the environment is calm and close to nature. For example, we have an outdoor packing area and green spaces that make long days more pleasant.

제안: Give a balanced opinion with one clear preference and a specific reason. Use linking words like 'however' or 'because' to connect ideas and avoid repetition.

예시: Sometimes I prefer to work in an office because the tasks feel less physically tiring; however, I would choose an office with a pleasant view because good scenery helps me stay motivated.

제안: Answer directly with a clear topic sentence about your main plan, then add a specific detail such as the subject, location, and intended career outcome. Minimize filler words.

예시: I plan to start a master's program in management in Munich. After completing the degree, I hope to combine management skills with my technical background to develop our family business's logistics and international sales.

× Currently I'm working with my family business.

✓ Currently I'm working in my family business.

Use the preposition 'in' or 'at' with 'business' to indicate employment. 'With' implies accompaniment rather than place of work. Use 'in my family business' to show you work for the family company.

× I graduated from aerospace engineering two years ago, but I will start master in management in Germany.

✓ I graduated in aerospace engineering two years ago, but I will start a master's in management in Germany.

Use 'graduated in' with a field of study. Also, the degree name needs articles and correct form: 'a master's in management' or 'a master's program in management'. This corrects noun phrase and article usage.

× I work with my family business.

✓ I work in my family business.

As above, 'in' is the correct preposition to indicate you are employed at or part of the family business. 'With' sounds like collaboration rather than employment.

× Uh, I worked every day, every weekend and every time because it's my business.

✓ I work every day, every weekend and all the time because it's my business.

The student is describing habitual present activity, so use present simple 'I work'. 'Every time' is unnatural for frequency; 'all the time' is a better idiom to express constant occurrence.

× Uh, we export and import fruit and vegetables.

✓ We export and import fruits and vegetables.

Use plural 'fruits and vegetables' when speaking generally about types of produce. This aligns with count noun usage for general categories.

× We are everywhere.

✓ We sell to many places around the world.

'We are everywhere' is vague and informal. A clearer, grammatically appropriate sentence is 'We sell to many places around the world' to convey broad market reach.

× I think, uh, my working place is good because, umm, it's very natural and quite, uh, place, uh, I've worked, I work.

✓ I think my workplace is good because it's very natural and peaceful, and I like working there.

'Working place' should be 'workplace'. The original has repetition and broken structure. Use clear adjectives ('natural' plus 'peaceful') and a simple clause 'I like working there' to express preference.

× Would you like the place where you work?

✓ Do you like the place where you work?

Question asked by examiner is fine; student's intended reply should use 'Do you like...' or 'Would you like...' depending on meaning. Here, correcting student's later reply to 'Do you like the place where you work?' clarifies proper auxiliary for present preference.

× Sometimes, umm, I feel very tired and I prefer to work uh, in the office, uh, but in the good scenery office, I need to do umm, being a good scenery, it's important for me.

✓ Sometimes I feel very tired and I prefer to work in an office with a nice view; a pleasant view is important to me.

Use present simple for habitual feelings: 'I feel' and 'I prefer'. Replace awkward phrases 'good scenery office' and 'being a good scenery' with 'an office with a nice view' and 'a pleasant view is important to me' for grammatical and natural expression.

× Actually, uh, I'm in the umm enrollment, university enrollment, umm stage in these days.

✓ Actually, I'm in the university enrollment stage these days.

Use 'I'm in the university enrollment stage' or 'I'm in the process of enrolling at university' for natural phrasing. 'These days' is acceptable; remove redundant 'umm' and repeated words.

× Uh, I will go to do uh, master uh program in Munich.

✓ I will go to do a master's program in Munich.

Use the noun phrase 'a master's program' with the indefinite article 'a'. Keep future tense 'I will go' if indicating future intention. Alternatively, 'I'm going to do a master's program in Munich' is also acceptable.