Friends— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Give a clearer topic sentence and add one specific example with a linking word. Avoid slight grammar issues (e.g., articles, plural/singular) and use a varied vocabulary (e.g., “busy schedules” instead of repeated “heavy workloads”). Keep within 3–4 sentences.

例: Yes — it's quite different now. I used to meet friends mostly at school when we had free time; however, because of busy schedules from university and work, I now catch up with them online or by messaging. For example, last month we held a video call to celebrate a birthday instead of meeting in person.

提案: Start with a direct topic sentence explaining suitability, then give a reason and a short example or contrast using a linking word (e.g., “because,” “so”). Use precise vocabulary (e.g., “atmosphere,” “privacy”) and avoid vague adjectives like “fancy” unless followed by why.

例: Some places are more suitable because they offer a calm atmosphere and privacy. For instance, I prefer cafes or cosy restaurants because they are quiet enough for conversation, whereas busy parks or cinemas are noisy and not ideal for catching up.

提案: Correct grammar (singular/plural, remove duplicated words) and make a clear topic sentence. Provide a concise reason and a brief example using linking words like “because” or “so.” Keep sentences varied and natural.

例: I prefer spending time with one friend because I often feel shy sharing personal details in a large group. For example, I usually invite a close friend for coffee so we can talk privately and more openly.

提案: Provide a natural opening sentence and avoid overstatements like “genius” unless toned down. Use linking words to connect ideas and give a specific example of a dish or activity. Correct small grammar issues and reduce redundancy.

例: Yes, I would definitely invite friends to my home because I enjoy cooking for them. For example, I often prepare a homemade stir-fry and dessert, and serving these meals makes me feel proud and close to my guests.

提案: Make the topic sentence direct and simplify the reason. Fix grammar and unclear phrasing (e.g., “encouraged me to do”). Use a linking word and give a specific scenario showing support to make the answer more concrete.

例: Friends are very important to me because they provide emotional and practical support. For example, when I struggled with exam stress last year, my friends helped me study and encouraged me, which made a big difference.

提案: Start with a clear topic sentence and correct grammar and word order. Use linking words (“because,” “so”) to connect reasons and outcomes. Replace repetitive phrases and provide a concise example of a typical weekend outing.

例: Not very often — we usually go out only on weekends because of heavy workloads during the week. For example, on Saturdays we might meet for brunch and then walk around the city to relax.

提案: Give a precise topic sentence, correct articles and verb forms, and link ideas smoothly. Add a specific detail (a favourite café or type of food) to make the answer more vivid. Keep it within 2–3 sentences.

例: We usually meet at cafés or restaurants to have drinks or a meal and catch up. For instance, we like a small local café near the university because it has a relaxed atmosphere and good coffee.

提案: Begin with a clear topic sentence, then explain briefly why you like the activity and what else you do while playing. Use linking words like “while” or “and” to make the connection clear and correct tense/form (Mahjong).

例: We usually play Mahjong because it's a popular and social game in China. While playing, we chat and share stories about our day, which makes the evenings fun and relaxed.

提案: Fix grammar and sentence structure: use a clear topic sentence, correct pronouns and tense, and provide a specific detail or memory to illustrate the length of the friendship. Use linking words like “since” or “because.”

例: Yes, I have a friend called Daniel whom I've known for more than ten years. We met in primary school and have kept in touch since then; for example, we still celebrate each other's birthdays every year.

× When I was younger, I usually met friends in school but now due to the heavy workloads, I have to meet friends online or send messages

✓ When I was younger, I usually met friends at school, but now because of heavy workloads, I have to meet friends online or send messages

Use 'at school' not 'in school' for meeting location (preposition). 'Because of' is more natural than 'due to' at clause start; remove plural 'the' before 'heavy workloads' for general statement; add comma and conjunction for sentence clarity.

× I prefer to meet friends in a quiet and relaxing place like a cafe or a fancy restaurant

✓ I prefer to meet friends in a quiet, relaxing place like a cafe or a fancy restaurant

Combine 'quiet and relaxing' with a comma or use adjectives in correct order; 'in a' is fine. This correction improves adjective coordination and punctuation for natural English.

× I prefer to spend time with one friends because sometimes I am really shy to share my daily life to to a group of friends so one friend is better for me.

✓ I prefer to spend time with one friend because sometimes I am really shy about sharing my daily life with a group of friends, so one friend is better for me.

Use singular 'friend' not 'friends' after 'one'. Use 'shy about sharing' and 'share with' (preposition) rather than 'share to'. Remove duplicate 'to'. Add commas to separate clauses.

× Ah yes I would like to invite friends to my home. I really like cooking for my friends. Maybe I'm a genius in cooking. So sharing some meals to my friends really makes me be proud

✓ Ah yes, I would like to invite friends to my home. I really like cooking for my friends. Maybe I'm great at cooking. So sharing meals with my friends really makes me proud.

Use 'great at cooking' rather than 'a genius in cooking' for naturalness. Use 'sharing meals with' not 'to'. 'Makes me proud' is correct form; remove 'be'. Add commas for clarity.

× Of course they are really important for me because I need some social support from different friends particularly when I met some challenges or problems encouraged me to do

✓ Of course they are really important to me because I need social support from different friends, particularly when I face challenges or problems that discourage me.

Use present 'face' to match general statement rather than past 'met'. 'Important to me' is the correct prepositional phrase. The original ending was unclear; likely intended 'that discourage me' rather than 'encouraged me to do'.

× Not really often we usually We go out at the weekend because of the heavy workloads we don't have enough time to meet very frequently. So just the weekend we can hold around the city.

✓ Not very often. We usually go out at the weekend because of heavy workloads; we don't have enough time to meet frequently, so only on weekends can we go around the city.

Break into clearer sentences. 'Not really often' changed to 'Not very often'. Remove duplicate 'We'. Use 'weekends' plural and reorder 'only on weekends can we...' for natural word order.

× We usually meet at cafe or restaurants we will have drinks or meal and share our daily life. It's really relaxing and comfortable to share our opinion.

✓ We usually meet at cafes or restaurants; we have drinks or meals and share our daily lives. It's really relaxing and comfortable to share our opinions.

Use plural 'cafes' or 'a cafe'. Use 'meals' plural. 'Daily life' -> 'daily lives' for multiple people. 'Opinion' -> 'opinions'. Add punctuation.

× We usually play Majang because it's a popular activity in China and we got into it during the playing time we can chat and share our daily life.

✓ We usually play Mahjong because it's a popular activity in China, and when we're playing we can chat and share our daily lives.

Correct spelling 'Mahjong'. Use 'when we're playing' (present continuous) to indicate simultaneous actions and 'daily lives' plural. Add commas for clarity.

× Yes I do. My friends Daniel who have known each other for more than ten years we met in primary school and kept touch with each other for the long time.

✓ Yes, I do. My friend Daniel and I have known each other for more than ten years; we met in primary school and have kept in touch for a long time.

Use singular 'friend' since referring to Daniel. Correct pronouns and verb agreement: 'Daniel and I have known' and 'have kept in touch' (present perfect) for continuing action. 'Kept touch' -> 'kept in touch'.