Friends— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and correct grammar: open with a clear topic sentence, then give one specific reason and an example. Avoid repetition ("old friend" used several times) and fix tense/number errors.

例: Yes. Since I moved to Canada, I meet my old friends in person much less often. For example, we now rely on video calls once a month, so it's harder to maintain the same closeness as before.

提案: Start with a direct topic sentence, then use linking words (e.g., "for example", "whereas") to contrast suitable and unsuitable places. Fix grammar and word order, and avoid repeating phrases.

例: Some places are better for meeting because they allow easy conversation. For example, a cozy coffee shop or a quiet meeting room is calm and lets people talk, whereas busy restaurants or clubs are too noisy for meaningful conversation.

提案: Correct grammar (missing subjects/auxiliaries, plural/singular), remove repetition, and finish thoughts. Use a clear topic sentence and one or two supporting reasons with a brief example.

例: I prefer spending time with one close friend because it's easier to make decisions and we understand each other's tastes. For instance, we can quickly agree on a movie genre and start watching, whereas coordinating a group often takes much longer.

提案: Good structure and specific details. To improve, vary vocabulary (e.g., "entertain" or "host") and add a linking phrase to connect the activities to the purpose more smoothly. Keep answers concise.

例: Yes, I often invite friends because I enjoy hosting small gatherings. For example, we usually have coffee, watch movies, and discuss books, which helps us relax and share interests.

提案: Remove hesitation and repetition, correct vocabulary ("empathize", "support" singular/plural), and give one concrete example of how they help. Start with a clear topic sentence and expand briefly.

例: Friends are essential to me because my small circle understands my profession and offers emotional and practical support. For example, a colleague-friend recently helped me review a difficult project and offered useful advice.

提案: Good content and structure; correct small errors ("rare" → "rarely", tense consistency). Use linking words like "however" properly and keep sentences clear and concise.

例: I don't often go out because we are all married and have busy family lives, so we rarely find time. However, we try to meet a few times a month for dinner, and next month we're planning a small reunion for a friend's birthday.

提案: Fix article and plural errors ("a new coffee shops" → "at new coffee shops"). Be specific about frequency and activities. Avoid vague phrases like "brand new coffee" and replace with more natural vocabulary.

例: We often meet at new coffee shops because we enjoy exploring different places. We like the relaxed atmosphere and trying different coffees when we catch up once or twice a week.

提案: Correct unclear or incorrect phrases ("walk prunes" unclear). Be specific about topics and activities, use linking words, and avoid vague listing. Keep sentences within the five-sentence limit.

例: We usually have lunch together when we share the same day off. Sometimes we go to a nice restaurant, but more often we meet at a cafe to catch up and talk about sports, work, and recent events.

提案: Remove incorrect phrasing ("known across a friend"). Start with a clear topic sentence, give concise background and one specific example of ongoing contact. Ensure pronouns and verb forms are correct.

例: Yes, I've known a close friend for over 20 years. We first met when she got married, and now she has two children; we often meet at her house for dinner to discuss family life and support each other.

× Yes, it's quite different now because I moved to Canada.

✓ Yes, it's quite different now because I have moved to Canada.

Use present perfect ('have moved') to connect a past action (relocating) with the present situation; 'moved' alone suggests a finished past without current relevance. Use present perfect when the exact time is not specified and the result affects now.

× I don't meet my old friend in person as much and there is a time gap so that it's hard to keep in touch with my old friend.

✓ I don't meet my old friends in person as much, and there is a time gap, so it's hard to keep in touch with them.

Use plural 'friends' to match general reference and use plural pronoun 'them' for agreement. Also add commas and remove redundant repeated phrase for clarity.

× Some places are suitable for a meeting such as a cozy coffee shop or a quiet office meeting room because they are calm and people can communicate easily at the places like busy restaurants or clubs as unsuitable because they are too loud.

✓ Some places are suitable for meeting, such as a cozy coffee shop or a quiet office meeting room, because they are calm and people can communicate easily; places like busy restaurants or clubs are unsuitable because they are too loud.

The original sentence is run-on and misorders clauses. Break into clearer clauses, remove unnecessary words ('a meeting' -> 'meeting'), and place 'unsuitable' correctly after the subject.

× I prefer spending time with one close friend, usually my best friend, because it easier to make a decisions and we understand each other's preference.

✓ I prefer spending time with one close friend, usually my best friend, because it's easier to make decisions and we understand each other's preferences.

Use contraction 'it's' (it is) for third person singular and uncountable 'decisions' should be plural without 'a'. 'Preferences' should be plural to match 'each other's'.

× For example, if we want to watch a new movie, we we can quickly agree on the genre and start watching, whereas coordinating with the group can take our.

✓ For example, if we want to watch a new movie, we can quickly agree on the genre and start watching, whereas coordinating with a group can take longer.

Remove duplicated 'we' and complete the comparative phrase 'take longer' to convey the intended meaning. 'The group' -> 'a group' is more natural here.

× I often invite my friends to my home because I enjoy hosting small get togethers.

✓ I often invite my friends to my home because I enjoy hosting small get-togethers.

Use hyphenated compound noun 'get-togethers' and 'hosting' is fine. This corrects spelling/formatting of the compound noun.

× We usually have coffee, watch movies or talk about books, which gives us a chance to relax and share our interests.

✓ We usually have coffee, watch movies, or talk about books, which gives us a chance to relax and share our interests.

Add Oxford comma before 'or' for clarity in a list; sentence is otherwise correct.

× Friends are essential to me since I only have a small circle because they share my profession, they emphasize with my struggles and offer practical supports.

✓ Friends are essential to me since I have a small circle; they share my profession, empathize with my struggles, and offer practical support.

Replace 'only have' with 'have' for clarity, use semicolon to separate clauses, 'empathize' is correct verb (not 'emphasize'), 'support' is uncountable here, and remove redundant 'because' structure.

× So, so that's why for me, it's, uh, important to.

✓ So that's why, for me, friends are important.

Remove filler words and incomplete clause. Rephrase to a complete, clear sentence matching context.

× I don't often go out with my friends because we are all married now and have busy family lives so we rare find time to meet.

✓ I don't often go out with my friends because we are all married now and have busy family lives, so we rarely find time to meet.

Replace 'rare' with adverb 'rarely' for correct adverb form, add comma before 'so'.

× However, we try to get together a few times a month for dinner and next month we are planning a small reunion to celebrate a friend's birthday.

✓ However, we try to get together a few times a month for dinner, and next month we are planning a small reunion to celebrate a friend's birthday.

Add comma before 'and' for clarity. Tenses are appropriate (present habit + present continuous for near future).

× My friend and I often meet a new coffee shops because we enjoy exploring different places.

✓ My friend and I often meet at new coffee shops because we enjoy exploring different places.

Use preposition 'at' for meeting locations and remove indefinite article 'a' before plural 'new coffee shops'.

× We love the relaxed atmosphere, the smell of fresh brand new coffee and trying new brands when we catch up once or twice a week.

✓ We love the relaxed atmosphere, the smell of fresh coffee, and trying new blends when we catch up once or twice a week.

'Brand new coffee' is awkward; 'fresh coffee' is natural. 'New brands' -> 'new blends' or 'new roasts' for coffee. Add comma before 'and'.

× My friends and I usually have lunch together when we share the same day off.

✓ My friends and I usually have lunch together when we share the same day off.

Sentence is correct; no quantifier error. No correction needed.

× Sometimes we go to a nice restaurant, but more often we meet at a cafe to catch up and chat about all sports topics like walk prunes and the recent events.

✓ Sometimes we go to a nice restaurant, but more often we meet at a cafe to catch up and chat about sports topics like workouts and recent events.

Replace 'all sports topics' with 'sports topics', correct 'walk prunes' (nonsense) to 'workouts', and 'the recent events' to 'recent events'; 'at a cafe' is correct.

× Yes, I've known across a friend for over 20 years.

✓ Yes, I've known a friend for over 20 years.

Remove incorrect preposition 'across'; use simple present perfect 'I've known a friend' to indicate long acquaintance.

× We first met when she got married and she now has two children.

✓ We first met when she got married, and she now has two children.

Add comma before 'and' for clarity. The sentence structure is otherwise correct; 'there' not needed.

× We often get together to catch up and have dinner at her house, which gives us time to talk about family life and support each other.

✓ We often get together to catch up and have dinner at her house, which gives us time to talk about family life and support each other.

Sentence is correct; no change needed.