Advertisement— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Câu trả lời cần rõ ràng hơn, dùng cấu trúc chủ đề + chi tiết hỗ trợ một cách mạch lạc, tránh từ sai (ví dụ 'app' nên là 'ad' hoặc 'commercial') và rút gọn xuống tối đa 4-5 câu. Thêm liên từ để nối ý (because, so, for example) và cung cấp chi tiết cụ thể về nhân vật hoạt hình hoặc bài hát để tăng tính sinh động.

例: One advertisement that impressed me as a child was a TV commercial for a toy featuring a funny cartoon rabbit. It had a very catchy jingle and bright colors, so I always remembered it and wanted the toy. For example, the rabbit sang a silly chorus and danced, which made me ask my parents to buy it after watching on TV.

提案: Cần sử dụng ngữ pháp và từ vựng chính xác hơn, tránh từ lộn xộn và tiếng lắp. Trả lời trực tiếp rồi bổ sung ví dụ cụ thể, dùng liên từ (for example, such as) và sửa lỗi phát âm/ghi từ (ví dụ 'subway' not 'subway to walk'). Hãy viết câu ngắn gọn, rõ ràng và cụ thể về loại quảng cáo bạn thấy.

例: Yes, I often see many advertisements on public transport, especially on subway platforms and inside trains. For example, there are digital screens and posters advertising mobile apps and food delivery services when I take the subway.

提案: Câu trả lời cần mạch lạc hơn: nêu quan điểm rõ ràng, giải thích lý do với ví dụ cụ thể, và dùng từ đúng (repetitive, pop up). Tránh câu dài lủng củng; dùng liên từ contrast (however, but) để thể hiện ý trái ngược một cách rõ ràng.

例: I don't really like most advertisements because they are repetitive and often interrupt what I'm doing. For example, pop-up ads during online videos can be very annoying. However, I do enjoy creative ads that are entertaining and informative.

提案: Cần diễn đạt rõ ràng hơn, dùng từ chính xác (short and funny videos), tránh cụm từ không tự nhiên như 'I refer' hoặc 'remember the brain'. Nên nêu lí do cụ thể tại sao những quảng cáo đó hiệu quả (e.g., catchy music, relatable characters) và dùng linking words để mạch lạc.

例: I prefer short, funny video advertisements because they are entertaining and easy to watch. They often have catchy music or relatable characters, so they stay in my memory and make me more likely to remember the brand.

提案: Cần chính xác và mạch lạc hơn: trả lời trực tiếp, giải thích nguyên nhân và nêu ví dụ cụ thể; sửa lỗi chữ viết/ghi âm (ví dụ 'ICS' không rõ). Tránh câu rời rạc, dùng linking words như 'for example' và tên nền tảng phổ biến (YouTube, Google).

例: Yes, I see a lot of ads on my phone and computer because I use social media and free apps frequently. For example, ads appear on YouTube and Google almost every time I open those sites, so I see them many times a day.

× Well, one app that impressed me when I was a child was a tall commercial with a funny cartoon character.

✓ Well, one advertisement that impressed me when I was a child was a TV commercial featuring a funny cartoon character.

The original sentence misused 'app' and 'tall commercial', which are semantic errors rather than tense. I corrected wording to 'advertisement' and 'TV commercial' to match context; tense 'impressed' is past and correct. Suggestion: use precise nouns (advertisement, commercial) and keep past tense for childhood memories.

× It had a very catchy song and bright colors, so I always remember it and I wanted that toy.

✓ It had a very catchy song and bright colors, so I always remembered it and wanted that toy.

Mixing present 'remember' with past context creates tense inconsistency. Use past tense 'remembered' to match 'had' and 'wanted'. Suggestion: maintain the same past tense when recounting past events.

× For example, I asked my parents to buy it after seeing the ad on TV.

✓ For example, I asked my parents to buy it after I saw the ad on TV.

The original uses 'after seeing' which is grammatically acceptable, but here 'after I saw' makes the event sequence clearer in past narration. Suggestion: when telling past stories, use simple past for clarity.

× Well yes, I have seen a lot of advertising after subway and cars because there are portals on the grounds and digital screens on both for example often noticed As for hmm mobile phone and food delivery apps when I take the subway to walk.

✓ Yes, I have seen a lot of advertising on the subway and on cars because there are posters on the sides and digital screens on both. I often notice ads for mobile phone and food delivery apps when I take the subway or walk.

Multiple preposition and word choice errors: use 'on the subway' and 'on cars', not 'after subway and cars'; 'posters' instead of 'portals'; 'on the sides' clarifies placement. Also fixed awkward phrasing 'take the subway to walk' to 'take the subway or walk'. Suggestion: use correct prepositions 'on' for surfaces and simplify sentence into two clear clauses.

× Well, I don't really like advertisements because they often repetitive and interrupt what I am doing.

✓ Well, I don't really like advertisements because they are often repetitive and interrupt what I am doing.

Missing auxiliary 'are' before 'often repetitive' is required; also placement of 'often' is better before adjective. Suggestion: include the correct form of 'to be' for adjective complements and place adverbs appropriately.

× For example, unlike us pop up when I am watching videos and it can be annoying.

✓ For example, pop-up ads appear when I am watching videos, and they can be annoying.

Original sentence is ungrammatical and unclear ('unlike us'). Rewrote to clear subject 'pop-up ads' and correct verb 'appear', matching plural 'they'. Suggestion: identify the subject and use correct verb agreement and pronouns.

× But I sometimes watch creative ads because they are friendly and informative.

✓ But I sometimes watch creative ads because they are engaging and informative.

'Friendly' describing ads is odd; 'engaging' is more natural. Pronoun use 'they' is correct. Suggestion: choose appropriate adjectives for objects; no pronoun error besides adjective choice.

× Well I refer short and funny videos as they are entertaining and I don't get boring so I usually watch them and I sometimes remember the brain because the ad is memorable.

✓ Well, I prefer short and funny videos because they are entertaining and don't bore me, so I usually watch them and sometimes remember them because the ad is memorable.

Multiple structure problems: 'refer' should be 'prefer'; 'I don't get boring' is wrong — use 'don't bore me'; 'remember the brain' is nonsensical, changed to 'remember them'. Suggestion: use correct verbs for preference, ensure subject-object clarity, and avoid literal translations.

× Yes, I often see advertisements on my phone and computer because I spend a lot of time on social media and free apps.

✓ Yes, I often see advertisements on my phone and computer because I spend a lot of time on social media and on free apps.

Original is mostly correct; added preposition 'on' before 'free apps' for parallel structure. Suggestion: maintain parallel prepositional phrases for clarity.

× For example ICS on YouTube and Google every time I open them so they appear many times a day.

✓ For example, ads appear on YouTube and Google every time I open them, so they show up many times a day.

Original 'ICS' unclear; adjusted to 'ads appear'; fixed word order and verb choice 'show up'. Suggestion: use clear nouns and natural phrasal verbs like 'show up' or 'appear' and keep logical word order.