Relax— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Make your answer more natural, concise and grammatically correct. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one specific reason and one brief detail. Avoid redundancy and awkward phrasing.

例: I usually relax on the rooftop of my flat. It’s a quiet spot where I can get fresh air and enjoy a clear view of the city, which helps me unwind after a busy day.

提案: Give a direct topic sentence first, then add one concise supporting detail. Correct pronoun and verb usage, and avoid repeating words. Use a linking phrase for the contrast (e.g., "but sometimes").

例: I usually relax on the rooftop by myself. But sometimes my friends join me when they are free, and we chat while enjoying the view.

提案: Answer directly and confidently. Use one concise topic sentence stating your opinion, then give a specific reason or example. Remove filler words and correct grammar (e.g., 'keeps me calm').

例: Yes, I find listening to music very relaxing. For example, calm instrumental or mellow pop songs help me reduce stress and clear my mind after a hectic day.

提案: Respond with a clear main activity, then give a specific detail or example. Fix grammar (use correct verb forms) and avoid repetition. Mention one or two concrete examples of the music you prefer.

例: To relax, I usually listen to music whenever I have free time. I prefer Nepali folk and soft pop songs because their melodies calm me and help me feel refreshed after a busy day.

× I usually go to the rooftop of my flat to relax because in the rooftop I get fresh air and the view of city that's why.

✓ I usually go to the rooftop of my flat to relax because on the rooftop I get fresh air and the view of the city.

Use 'on the rooftop' not 'in the rooftop' for being on a building surface (preposition error). Also use the definite article 'the' with 'city' when referring to a specific city (article error). Combine clauses more naturally by removing 'that's why'. Suggestion: say 'because on the rooftop I get fresh air and the view of the city.'

× Most of the time I go to go on the rooftop alone, but sometimes if my friends are with me then me and my friends go to relax.

✓ Most of the time I go to the rooftop alone, but sometimes if my friends are with me, my friends and I go to relax.

Remove duplicated 'go to' and correct pronoun order and form: use 'my friends and I' not 'me and my friends' in subject position (pronoun error/subject-verb agreement context). Add comma for clarity. Suggestion: 'Most of the time I go to the rooftop alone, but sometimes my friends and I go to relax.'

× As I do, listening to music makes umm makes my mind to relax and I keep you calm.

✓ For me, listening to music calms my mind and keeps me calm.

Do not use 'to' after 'makes' when followed by a verb; use bare infinitive or rephrase. 'Makes my mind to relax' is incorrect; use 'calms my mind' or 'makes my mind relax'. Also 'I keep you calm' is wrong subject/pronoun: should be 'keeps me calm'. Suggestion: 'For me, listening to music calms my mind and keeps me calm.'

× And for relax from busy daily routine, I prefer to listen listen listening to music whenever I get free time.

✓ And to relax from my busy daily routine, I prefer listening to music whenever I have free time.

Use 'to relax' or 'for relaxing' to express purpose; 'for relax' is incorrect (verb/noun form). Use 'prefer listening to' or 'prefer to listen to' consistently; avoid repetition. Also use 'my busy daily routine' and 'have free time' for natural phrasing. Suggestion: 'And to relax from my busy routine, I prefer listening to music whenever I have free time.'

× I understand you that I usually listening to music whenever I get free time because it makes my mind relax and to make me refreshed after my busy my busy daily routine.

✓ I mean that I usually listen to music whenever I have free time because it calms my mind and refreshes me after my busy daily routine.

'I understand you that' is ungrammatical; use 'I mean that' or 'I want to say that'. Use correct verb forms: 'listen to' not 'listening' after 'usually'; 'it calms my mind' and 'refreshes me' use correct verbs rather than 'to make me refreshed'. Remove repeated phrase 'my busy'. Suggestion: 'I mean that I usually listen to music whenever I have free time because it calms my mind and refreshes me after my busy daily routine.'

× I prefer to listening to music Nepali music like.

✓ I prefer listening to Nepali music.

Word order and redundancy are incorrect. Use 'prefer listening to Nepali music' or 'I prefer Nepali music.' Avoid trailing 'like' without an example. Suggestion: 'I prefer listening to Nepali music.'