Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

練習Part12026-11-02 16:31:59

会話

Part 1

試験官

Did you have a bike when you were a child?

受験者

Yes I did. I had had a bike before when I was a child, but now as my academic pressure started to increase, I don't have the time to ride a bike anymore.

試験官

Do you think bikes are popular in your country?

受験者

Yes, indeed. I think the popularity of bike increases because of the building of cycling paths in the new territories in Hong Kong.

評価

総合

総合: 5.5流暢さと一貫性: 5.5発音: 5.5文法: 5.5語彙: 5.5

Part 1

Did you have a bike when you were a child?

スコア: 65.0

提案: 回答直接,但“had had a bike before when I was a child”重复且时态不自然;可以直接说“I had a bike”。后半句可用更自然的表达说明现在没时间骑车,并补充一个具体细节,例如学业占用了课余时间。注意控制句子长度,让表达简洁连贯。

例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child, and I used to ride it around my neighborhood. These days, though, I’m too busy with schoolwork to go cycling.

Do you think bikes are popular in your country?

スコア: 68.0

提案: 你有明确回答问题,也提供了原因,但“the popularity of bike increases”和“the building of cycling paths”不够自然。可以改用“cycling is becoming more popular”以及“the construction of cycling paths”。另外,增加一个具体结果或例子,例如更多人骑车通勤或休闲,这样内容会更充分、更连贯。

例: Yes, cycling is quite popular in Hong Kong, and I think it’s becoming more so as more cycling paths are built in the New Territories. They give people safer places to ride, especially on weekends.

文法

5: Past tense issue(过去时态错误)

× I had had a bike before when I was a child, but now as my academic pressure started to increase, I don't have the time to ride a bike anymore.

✓ I had a bike when I was a child, but now, as my academic pressure started to increase, I don't have time to ride a bike anymore.

这里是在描述小时候拥有自行车这一过去事实,没有另一个过去事件作为参照,因此不需要用过去完成时“had had”,应使用一般过去时“had”。“before”与“when I was a child”在此处表达重复,可删去“before”。

1: Singular and plural issue(单复数问题)

× I think the popularity of bike increases because of the building of cycling paths in the new territories in Hong Kong.

✓ I think the popularity of bikes increases because of the building of cycling paths in the New Territories in Hong Kong.

“bike”是可数名词,泛指自行车时不能单独使用单数形式;这里应使用复数“bikes”。此外,“New Territories”是香港“新界”的专有名称,首字母应大写。

重要語彙

New— Recently developed; Novel; Different; Additional; Reinvigorated
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