Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: You give a clear answer and a personal reason, but “features, special extra features” is repetitive, and using “although” and “but” together makes the sentence awkward. Say “many special features” and connect your contrasting ideas more smoothly.

例: Yes, I had a bike as a child. It didn’t have many special features, but it was very special to me because it was my first birthday present. I rode it everywhere.

提案: Your opinion is clear, but “Even from child to even adults” is not a complete or natural phrase. Use “from children to adults.” Also, replace “on their side” with a natural expression such as “available” and explain briefly why bikes are popular with a specific example.

例: Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country among both children and adults. They’re convenient for short trips, especially in busy areas where parking can be difficult. Many people also use them to commute or get some exercise.

× Yes, I had a bike when I was a child, although it didn't have a lot of features, special extra features, but it was very precious to me because it was my first ever birthday present and I rode it everywhere.

✓ Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. Although it didn't have many special extra features, it was very precious to me because it was my first-ever birthday present, and I rode it everywhere.

Although and but both introduce a contrast, so using them together in the same clause is redundant. Use although without but, or use but without although. The revised sentence uses although.

× Even from child to even adults.

✓ People of all ages, from children to adults, enjoy having a bike available whenever they need one.

The original is a sentence fragment because it has no main verb. Add a verb to express a complete thought. Here, enjoy is the main verb.

× Even from child to even adults.

✓ People of all ages, from children to adults, enjoy having a bike available whenever they need one.

When referring generally to people across age groups, use the plural children to match adults. The phrase from children to adults is the natural plural form.