Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Answer the childhood question directly and distinguish between a bicycle and a motorbike if you mean different things. Use the correct age phrase, “when I was about 12,” and clarify what “paid 400 time” means. Add one relevant detail, such as where or how you rode it.

例: Yes, I had a bicycle when I was about 12, and I used to ride it around my neighborhood. I didn't buy a motorbike until I was 22, and it cost about 400 [currency].

提案: Your answer is direct and gives a reason, but “big vehicles” is vague. Name a specific comparison, such as cars, and add a concrete detail about why bikes are popular. Use “compared with” for a more natural comparison.

例: Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country because they’re convenient and easy to park. Compared with cars, they’re also cheaper to run and can be quicker in heavy traffic.

× I had the cycle when I was like 12 year old but then after when I turned 22 I got a bike which was paid 400 time.

✓ I had a cycle when I was about 12 years old, but after I turned 22, I got a bike that cost 400.

Use a, not the, when mentioning a singular countable noun for the first time and when it is not already identified. Use the only when the listener knows which cycle you mean.

× I had the cycle when I was like 12 year old but then after when I turned 22 I got a bike which was paid 400 time.

✓ I had a cycle when I was about 12 years old, but after I turned 22, I got a bike that cost 400.

Use the plural noun years in the expression 12 years old. For ages greater than one, year must be plural.

× I had the cycle when I was like 12 year old but then after when I turned 22 I got a bike which was paid 400 time.

✓ I had a cycle when I was about 12 years old, but after I turned 22, I got a bike that cost 400.

After and when should not be combined in this construction. Use after I turned 22 or when I turned 22. Here, after clearly expresses the intended sequence.

× I had the cycle when I was like 12 year old but then after when I turned 22 I got a bike which was paid 400 time.

✓ I had a cycle when I was about 12 years old, but after I turned 22, I got a bike that cost 400.

The bike does not pay someone, so was paid is not an appropriate passive construction. Use cost to state the price. If you want to emphasize your payment, you could say a bike that I paid 400 for.