Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 先直接回答，再补充一到两个相关细节即可。注意语法：应说“on my eighth birthday”或“when I was eight”，骑自行车用“rode it”，而不是“rolled it”；过去完成的动作应说“after I had grown up”。最后的“but I had”没有表达完整意思，应删除或补全。避免用多个“and”把所有信息连在一起。

例: Yes, I did. My parents gave me a bicycle for my eighth birthday, and I often rode it in the park near our home. I really enjoyed cycling because it made me feel happy and relaxed. I stopped using it when I grew up.

提案: 回答内容切题，并提供了城市交通方式、骑行道和高峰期安全等具体理由。语法和表达还可以更自然：把“and where”改成“where”或另起一句；删去重复的“people few people”；“during the rush hour”可简化为“during rush hour”。此外，题目问的是整个国家，可以先说明你对中国整体的看法，再用深圳作为例子。

例: I think bikes are fairly popular in China, although it depends on the city. In Shenzhen, many people rely on cars or the subway because it’s a large, modern city. Also, some central areas don’t have enough bike lanes, so cycling can feel unsafe during rush hour. As a result, fewer people choose bikes for their daily commute.

× My parents gave me a bicycle as a present on my 8 years old birthday.

✓ My parents gave me a bicycle as a present on my eighth birthday.

“8 years old”不能直接用来修饰“birthday”。这里应使用序数词“eighth”，表示“第八个生日”。

× The bicycle was sold after I grown up.

✓ The bicycle was sold after I grew up.

这句话描述过去发生的事情，因此“grow”应使用一般过去式“grew”。“grown”是过去分词，不能在这里单独作谓语。

× But I had.

✓ The bicycle was sold after I grew up.

“but I had”是一个不完整的句子。“had”后面通常需要补充宾语或其他成分，而且这里没有表达清楚转折内容。可以删去这个未完成的部分。

× It's a large modern city and where most people prefer to travel by car or subway rather than by bike.

✓ It's a large modern city where most people prefer to travel by car or subway rather than by bike.

“where”已经引导修饰“city”的定语从句，因此这里不需要再加“and”。去掉“and”后句子结构更正确。

× During the rush hour the roads are very busy.

✓ During rush hour, the roads are very busy.

表示“在交通高峰期”时，固定表达通常是“during rush hour”，不需要在“rush hour”前加定冠词“the”。

× So people few people choose it for daily commuting.

✓ So few people choose cycling for their daily commute.

“people few people”重复使用了“people”，造成句子结构错误。应改为“few people”（很少有人）。此外，用“choose cycling”可以清楚表达“选择骑行”。