Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Сначала дайте прямой ответ, затем добавьте одну-две конкретные детали. Исправьте грамматику: скажите «my father bought it for me», а не «both bought me my father»; для велосипеда используйте «ride», а не «write». Уберите повторы и слова-паразиты, а мысль в конце завершите — например, уточните, что именно вы до сих пор делаете.

例: Yes, I had a red bike that my father bought for me when I was about eight. At first, I found it difficult to ride and fell a few times, but I soon got the hang of it. I was proud of it and often showed it to my friends.

提案: Ответ по существу и содержит сравнение, но вы можете выразить позицию увереннее: вместо «I don't know about a whole country» скажите, что популярность велосипедов зависит от региона. Используйте естественные конструкции «the whole country», «older people and children» и «prefer cycling». Добавьте конкретную причину, например загруженность дорог или удобство автомобиля.

例: Bikes are not especially popular in my city, although they may be more common in other parts of the country. Most adults prefer private vehicles because they are more convenient, especially on busy roads. However, children and some older people still cycle for short trips or exercise.

× Yes, I had a red bike that both bought me my father uh when I was about 8.

✓ Yes, I had a red bike that my father bought me when I was about 8.

The words in the relative clause are in the wrong order. Put the subject before the verb: my father bought me. This creates the grammatical clause that my father bought me.

× At first it was really hard to uh write I often and I often fell, but after a while I got the hang of it and started enjoying cycling.

✓ At first, it was really hard to ride, and I often fell, but after a while I got the hang of it and started enjoying cycling.

The phrase write I often does not form a grammatical clause. In this context, use ride after to and place I often fell in a separate clause. A useful approach is to check that each clause has a clear subject and verb.

× I used to show it to my friends and I still.

✓ I used to show it to my friends, and I still do.

The second clause is incomplete because still needs an auxiliary verb here. Add do to refer back to the action show it. In short answers or follow-up clauses, use do when the main verb has already been mentioned.

× I don't know about a whole country, but in my city people mostly prefer private vehicles rather than cycling.

✓ I don't know about the whole country, but in my city people mostly prefer private vehicles rather than cycling.

Use the definite article the when referring to the country as a specific, complete place. A whole country would mean any entire country, rather than the speaker's own country.

× I think elderly and children often prefer to cycle around the city.

✓ I think the elderly and children often prefer to cycle around the city.

When elderly refers to elderly people as a general group, it is used with the definite article: the elderly. You can also say elderly people and children, which avoids using the adjective as a noun.