Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Answer the question directly, but avoid fillers such as “Uh,” “like,” and “actually.” The phrase “around like age of probably 5:00 to 6:00” is unnatural; say “when I was about five or six.” Your final sentence is incomplete and unclear, so add a specific activity or place, such as riding around your neighborhood or visiting a park. Keep the answer to two or three complete sentences.

例: Yes, I had a bike and rode it quite often when I was a child. I learned to ride when I was about five or six, and during the summer, I would ride around my neighborhood or go to the park with my friends.

提案: Give a clear opinion in the first sentence instead of saying “I’m quite not sure.” Correct the grammar in “as far as I concerned” to “as far as I’m concerned,” “choosing riding” to “choosing to ride,” and “getting much popular” to “becoming more popular.” Use fewer fillers and repetitions of “actually” and “like.” Also complete the unfinished comparison with the past, and support your opinion with a specific reason, such as traffic congestion or environmental concerns.

例: Yes, I think bikes are becoming more popular in my country. In recent years, many people have started choosing to ride bikes instead of driving because traffic congestion has become worse. Compared with the past, cycling is now more common, especially among young people and commuters.

× I started learning how to ride a bike around like age of probably 5:00 to 6:00.

✓ I started learning how to ride a bike at around the age of five or six.

The noun age usually requires the definite article the in this expression: the age of five or six. Also, ages should be expressed with numbers such as five or six, not clock-time expressions such as 5:00 to 6:00.

× As far as I concerned, especially in like recent years due to the traffic jam, lots of people are actually choosing riding a bike over a car.

✓ As far as I am concerned, especially in recent years, lots of people have been choosing to ride a bike instead of driving a car because of traffic congestion.

The fixed expression is as far as I am concerned, so the auxiliary verb am is required. In addition, choose is normally followed by a to-infinitive: choose to ride. The revised sentence also uses parallel structures, to ride and driving.

× Lots of people are actually choosing riding a bike over a car.

✓ Lots of people are actually choosing to ride a bike instead of driving a car.

The verb choose is followed by a to-infinitive, not normally a gerund. Therefore, choosing riding should be changed to choosing to ride. Using driving after instead of also makes the two alternatives grammatically parallel.

× Nowadays it's actually getting much popular.

✓ Nowadays, it is actually becoming much more popular.

Popular is a long adjective, so its comparative form is more popular. The adverb much can modify a comparative adjective, giving much more popular, but it cannot normally be used directly before popular.