Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Answer directly, but add one or two specific details to make your response more developed. For example, mention when you received the bike, how often you used it, or where you rode it. Avoid simply repeating the words from the question.

例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. I received it as a birthday present when I was about eight, and I often rode it around my neighborhood with my friends.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence and organize the supporting details with linking words such as “because” and “for example.” The phrase “they are very inspired to those who are athletes” is unnatural; say “they inspire athletes” or explain that “many people are inspired by professional cyclists.” Also, use “cycling activities” instead of “this kind of activities,” and avoid the unclear phrase “any kind of sport related to a bike.”

例: Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country, especially among young people and fitness enthusiasts. Many people ride them for exercise because cycling is an enjoyable way to stay healthy. For example, it is common to see people cycling in parks and along rivers early in the morning.

× Yes, bikes are popular in our country and sometimes they are very inspired to those who are athletes or any kind of sport related to a bike and they also take this kind of activities as their exercise especially doing every morning.

✓ Yes, bikes are popular in our country, and they are sometimes very inspiring to athletes and people involved in any kind of bike-related sport. They also take this kind of activity as exercise, especially by doing it every morning.

The adjective inspired describes how a person feels, while inspiring describes something that causes people to feel motivated. Because bikes motivate athletes, inspiring is the correct adjective. Also, bike-related should be used as a compound adjective before sport.

× Yes, bikes are popular in our country and sometimes they are very inspired to those who are athletes or any kind of sport related to a bike and they also take this kind of activities as their exercise especially doing every morning.

✓ Yes, bikes are popular in our country, and they are sometimes very inspiring to athletes and people involved in any kind of bike-related sport. They also take this kind of activity as exercise, especially by doing it every morning.

After the expression this kind of, the noun is normally singular because this kind of refers to one category or type. Therefore, activity is correct instead of activities. If you use a plural noun, say these kinds of activities.

× Yes, bikes are popular in our country and sometimes they are very inspired to those who are athletes or any kind of sport related to a bike and they also take this kind of activities as their exercise especially doing every morning.

✓ Yes, bikes are popular in our country, and they are sometimes very inspiring to athletes and people involved in any kind of bike-related sport. They also take this kind of activity as exercise, especially by doing it every morning.

The original sentence contains too many ideas joined by and, which makes the structure difficult to follow. Divide it into two sentences and use people involved in any kind of bike-related sport to create a clear parallel structure. The phrase especially doing every morning is incomplete; especially by doing it every morning clearly explains how they use cycling as exercise.