Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 질문에 바로 답하려면 “Yes, I did”로 시작하고, 과거의 경험이므로 시제를 일관되게 과거형으로 사용해야 합니다(“I had,” “It had,” “my father gave it to me”). “When I was child”는 “When I was a child”로 고치고, “side wheels”는 “training wheels,” “very beautiful for me”는 “beautiful” 또는 “special to me”가 더 자연스럽습니다. 또한 “So because”처럼 이유를 중복해서 연결하지 말고 “because” 또는 “That’s because” 하나만 사용하세요. 자전거의 특징, 좋아했던 이유, 아버지가 준 의미를 3~4개의 명확한 문장으로 연결하면 더 효과적입니다.

例: Yes, I did. When I was a child, I had a blue bike with training wheels, so I could ride it safely. It was special to me because my father gave it to me, and blue was my favorite color.

提案: “Yes, I think they are”처럼 직접적인 주제문으로 시작한 뒤, 인기 있는 이유를 정확한 표현으로 설명하세요. “Han lever”와 “hand liver”는 “the Han River,” “many bikers are usually ride”는 “many people ride” 또는 “many cyclists ride,” “it bike is very popular transportation”은 “bikes are a popular means of transportation”으로 고쳐야 합니다. 강변의 아름다운 경치와 교통수단이라는 두 가지 이유를 “Also”나 “In addition”으로 연결하면 논리가 분명해집니다. “because”를 반복하지 말고, 자전거 도로·운동·출퇴근과 같은 구체적인 세부 내용을 추가하면 어휘와 내용 점수가 향상됩니다.

例: Yes, I think bikes are quite popular in my country. Many people ride along the Han River because the scenery is beautiful and there are well-maintained bike paths. In addition, some people use bicycles for exercise or short commutes.

× When I was child I had one bike and it was very beautiful for me.

✓ When I was a child, I had a bike, and it was very beautiful to me.

The singular countable noun child needs the indefinite article a. Bike is also a singular countable noun, so a bike is more natural than one bike when simply describing ownership. The preposition to is more natural than for when expressing a personal impression.

× It has side wheels so that I could ride it very stably and furthermore its color was blue.

✓ It had side wheels, so I could ride it safely. Furthermore, its color was blue.

The question asks about a childhood experience in the past, so has should be changed to had. The sentence also needs punctuation before the connecting expression Furthermore. Safely is more natural than very stably when describing riding a bike.

× So because I love blue and my father gave it.

✓ I loved blue, and my father gave the bike to me.

The original sentence is incomplete because it begins with So because but does not contain a complete main clause. Since the story is in the past, love should be changed to loved. The phrase gave it to me clearly identifies the recipient and avoids an unclear pronoun reference.

× Bikes are very popular in my country because of hand lever.

✓ Bikes are very popular in my country because of the Han River.

A specific geographical feature such as the Han River normally takes the definite article the. Hand lever appears to be a mishearing or speech error; the likely intended name is the Han River.

× Many bikers are usually ride along the Han lever.

✓ Many bikers usually ride along the Han River.

Usually expresses a habitual action, so the simple present form ride is required. Do not use are before the base verb ride. The simple present is appropriate because the sentence describes a general situation.

× Many bikers usually ride along the Han River because is so beautiful.

✓ Many bikers usually ride along the Han River because it is so beautiful.

The clause after because needs a subject. The pronoun it refers to the Han River, so the complete clause is because it is so beautiful.

× Furthermore it bike is very popular transportation.

✓ Furthermore, biking is a very popular means of transportation.

It bike is not a correct noun phrase. Biking is suitable when referring to the activity or mode of transportation. The sentence also needs the article a before the singular countable phrase means of transportation.

× Biking is a very popular means of transportation.

✓ Biking is a very popular means of transportation.

This sentence is grammatically correct. The singular noun means is used correctly in the fixed expression a means of transportation, so no grammatical change is needed.