Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Câu trả lời có ý chính và lý do, nhưng mắc nhiều lỗi ngữ pháp và dùng từ. Hãy nói “I received a bike for my fifth birthday” thay vì “I had a bike as a birthday” và không dùng đồng thời “that” với “it”. “When I was in great like 5” nên sửa thành “when I was about five”. Ngoài ra, “rock Rd.” không đúng ngữ cảnh; hãy dùng “ride around the neighborhood” hoặc “ride it anywhere”. Nên giảm các từ ngập ngừng như “umm” và sắp xếp câu theo cấu trúc: trả lời trực tiếp → thêm thời điểm → nêu lý do hoặc hoạt động cụ thể.

例: Yes, I did. I received a bike for my fifth birthday, and I was really excited about it. I loved riding it around my neighborhood because it gave me a sense of freedom.

提案: Bạn đã trả lời trực tiếp và đưa ra lý do phù hợp, nhưng một số cụm từ chưa tự nhiên và ý diễn đạt còn lặp lại. Thay “my country is Vietnam which is very popular with...” bằng “Vietnam has many crowded roads and motorbikes”. Cần phân biệt “bikes” và “motorbikes”, đồng thời nói rõ rằng xe đạp không phổ biến bằng xe máy vì đường đông và không an toàn. Hãy tránh tự sửa quá nhiều lần như “using or riding, I mean riding” và dùng từ nối như “because” hoặc “as a result” để câu trả lời mạch lạc hơn.

例: Not really. Although cycling is becoming more popular among young people, motorbikes are still much more common in Vietnam. The roads are often crowded, so riding a bicycle can be difficult and sometimes unsafe.

× Yes, I had a bike as a birthday that my parent gave it to me when I was in great like 5.

✓ Yes, I had a bike as a birthday present that my parents gave me when I was around five. I really liked that bike because I could ride anywhere on it.

The noun parent should be plural because the speaker means both parents. Use parents instead of parent when referring to more than one person.

× Yes, I had a bike as a birthday that my parent gave it to me when I was in great like 5.

✓ Yes, I had a bike as a birthday present that my parents gave me when I was around five. I really liked that bike because I could ride anywhere on it.

In the relative clause, that already functions as the object of gave. Therefore, it is unnecessary to repeat the object with it. Say my parents gave me the bike, or a bike that my parents gave me.

× Yes, I had a bike as a birthday that my parent gave it to me when I was in great like 5.

✓ Yes, I had a bike as a birthday present that my parents gave me when I was around five. I really liked that bike because I could ride anywhere on it.

The phrase in great like 5 is not grammatically correct for expressing age. Use around five or at about the age of five. Also, ride anywhere on it is the appropriate prepositional phrase for riding a bicycle.

× I really like that bike because umm I can rock Rd. anywhere with that bike.

✓ Yes, I had a bike as a birthday present that my parents gave me when I was around five. I really liked that bike because I could ride anywhere on it.

The answer describes a bike the speaker had during childhood, so the past tense liked is more suitable than the present tense like. Keep the main verbs in the past to match the question about childhood.

× I really like that bike because umm I can rock Rd. anywhere with that bike.

✓ Yes, I had a bike as a birthday present that my parents gave me when I was around five. I really liked that bike because I could ride anywhere on it.

Because the speaker is talking about an ability in the past, use the past modal could instead of the present modal can. The correct form is I could ride anywhere.

× Umm not really, because my country is Vietnam which is very popular with each uh like crowded Rd. with many motorbikes.

✓ Not really, because my country, Vietnam, has many crowded roads with motorbikes.

The original sentence has an unclear and incomplete structure. Vietnam is the country that has crowded roads; it is not popular with crowded roads. Use has many crowded roads to express this idea clearly. Remove the false starts and unnecessary words such as each and like.