Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be direct and clear in the topic sentence, correct grammar, avoid confusing phrases, and add one specific supporting detail. Use linking words if adding extra information. Keep it under five sentences.

例: Yes — I had my first bike when I was five. My father bought it for me as a present, and I used to ride it every evening around our neighborhood. Because it had training wheels at first, I learned to balance gradually and felt very proud when I could ride without them.

提案: Start with a clear topic sentence answering the question, fix grammar and word order, and give one or two specific supporting details (where, who uses them, when). Use linking words to connect ideas and finish the sentence. Keep it concise (1–4 sentences).

例: Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country. For example, in my town there are many well-maintained cycling tracks, so families and groups of friends often cycle together on weekends.

× Yes, I had a bike when I was five. I remember that my father bought me a bike that is my first gift for my father.

✓ Yes, I had a bike when I was five. I remember that my father bought me a bike; it was my first gift from him.

The sentence mixes past and present tense and uses awkward phrasing. 'Is' should be past 'was' to match the past context (Grammar problem type 5: Past tense issue). Also 'for my father' is incorrect; the intended meaning is that the father gave the gift, so use 'from him'. Use a semicolon or separate sentences to connect the clauses. Suggestion: keep verbs in past tense when recalling past events and use 'from' to indicate the giver.'

× I think by our popular in my country, just like my living place, there are lots of well facilitated cycling track that people can enjoy cycling together in the weekend and

✓ I think bicycles are popular in my country. Where I live, there are lots of well-facilitated cycling tracks where people can enjoy cycling together on weekends.

Multiple issues: 'by our popular' is ungrammatical; correct expression is 'bicycles are popular' (this involves sentence restructuring but centers on preposition and word choice errors, Grammar problem type 11). 'My living place' should be 'where I live'. 'Well facilitated' is odd but acceptable as 'well-facilitated'; 'cycling track' should be plural 'cycling tracks' (singular/plural issue but fixed within restructuring). Use 'on weekends' instead of 'in the weekend' and end sentence properly. Suggestion: use 'bicycles are popular' to state popularity, use 'where I live' for location, pluralize countable nouns, and use 'on weekends' for habitual weekend activities.'