Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Improve coherence and sentence variety. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details with linking words. Avoid short choppy sentences by combining related ideas and using past-tense markers consistently.

例: Yes, I did — my parents bought me a small pink bike when I was a child. At first it had training wheels, but later my father removed them so I could learn to balance properly. I remember riding it every afternoon; it was my favorite possession because it made me feel independent and confident.

提案: Make the response more natural and concise. Begin with a direct answer, then give two specific supporting points linked with connectors (for example, because, for instance). Use accurate collocations (e.g., 'go cycling', 'popular among').

例: Yes, I think bikes are very popular in my country. For example, many people go cycling in the mornings and on weekends for exercise, and cycling has become a trendy leisure activity, especially among young people.

× My mother bought me.

✓ My mother bought one for me.

The original sentence lacks an object; 'bought me' is incorrect because 'buy' requires the thing bought as object (not the person). Use 'bought one for me' or 'bought me a bike' to show what was purchased. Suggestion: include the purchased item (a bike) or use 'for me'.

× It had four wheels in the beginning and my father took two off.

✓ It had four wheels at the beginning, and my father took two of them off.

Use 'at the beginning' rather than 'in the beginning' for this context and include the object of 'two' ('of them') to clarify what was removed. Also add a comma before the conjunction for clarity. Suggestion: specify the noun after 'two' and use 'at the beginning'.

× It was my favorite thing to have.

✓ It was my favorite thing to have as a child.

The sentence is grammatically acceptable but vague in time; adding 'as a child' clarifies reference to the earlier question. If you want conciseness, use 'It was my favorite possession.' Suggestion: clarify time or rephrase for naturalness.

× It is yes I see a lot of people do cycling during the weekends especially in the morning and it's such a trend in my country so a lot of people are doing it.

✓ Yes, I do. I see a lot of people cycling on weekends, especially in the morning; it is a big trend in my country, so many people do it.

Several problems: fragmented response and tense/verb choice. 'It is yes I see' is awkward — begin with 'Yes, I do.' Use 'cycling' rather than 'do cycling'. Use 'on weekends' not 'during the weekends'. Use punctuation to separate clauses. 'A lot of people are doing it' is acceptable but repetitive; 'many people do it' is more natural. Suggestion: start with a concise answer, use 'cycling' (verb+ing) and correct preposition 'on weekends', and punctuate sentences to avoid run-ons.