Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Give a clear, grammatically correct topic sentence that directly answers the question, then add one or two specific supporting details. Correct verb forms and word choice (e.g., "rode" not "rides", "a hired bike" could be "a borrowed bike" or "a rental bike"). Keep it concise (no more than 3–4 sentences) and avoid unclear endings like "and this is why many." Use a linking word if you add an extra detail (e.g., "because", "so").

例: Yes. I usually rode a borrowed bike when I was a child because my family could not afford to buy one. I rode it to school almost every day, which helped me become confident cycling on busy streets.

提案: Start with a direct opinion sentence (Yes/No/It depends). Use clear vocabulary—avoid unclear words like "vato" and replace with "bicycles". Give specific reasons with correct grammar and linking words (e.g., "because", "for example", "therefore"). Keep sentences short and logical, and provide one concrete example or fact to support your view.

例: Yes, bicycles used to be very popular in my country, especially in rural areas, because many families could not afford motor vehicles. For example, people often cycled long distances to get to work or school, so bicycles were a common and practical choice.

× It was a hired bike when I was a child and I always rides bike to go to school and this is why many.

✓ It was a hired bike when I was a child, and I always rode a bike to go to school, which is why many people did too.

Errors: 'rides' is incorrect for past habitual action — use past tense 'rode' (Past tense issue, ID 5). Also missing article before 'bike' (Article errors, ID 22) and sentence fragment 'this is why many' is unclear and ungrammatical (Sentence structure errors, ID 26). Correction choices: change 'always rides' to 'always rode' to match past time reference; add 'a' before 'bike'; clarify 'many' as 'many people did too' and join clauses with commas. Suggestion: maintain consistent past tense for past habits and include necessary articles and complete noun phrases.

× In the past and the vato is very popular in my country because at the territory the people most people is very poor and I think the vato is most variable in their families and in that period because we need a long time to go to the workplace

✓ In the past, the bicycle was very popular in my country because many people in rural areas were very poor, and I think the bicycle was the most affordable means for families at that time because we needed a long time to get to the workplace.

Multiple errors: incorrect pronoun/word 'vato' (replace with 'bicycle') and awkward phrasing 'at the territory' and 'the people most people' (Sentence structure errors, ID 26). Verb tenses must be past for a past period: change 'is' to 'was' and 'need' to 'needed' (Past tense issue, ID 5). 'Most variable' is wrong adjective choice; use 'most affordable' or 'cheapest' (Incorrect use of adjectives, ID 13). Also use 'many people' instead of 'the people most people' (Incorrect use of quantifiers/pronouns, IDs 14 and 12). Suggestions: use clear nouns, keep past tense consistently, choose appropriate adjectives (affordable/cheap), and simplify to 'rural areas' or 'rural regions' for 'territory'.