Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and natural: start with a clear topic sentence, then add one specific supporting detail. Avoid repetition (e.g., "did have"). Use a linking phrase to connect ideas.

例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. My grandfather taught me to ride it when I was about six, and I remember practicing every evening in our courtyard until I felt confident.

提案: Make the answer more natural and specific. Start with a direct opinion, then give 1–2 clear reasons with linking words and correct grammar. Remove repetition and use context-relevant vocabulary (e.g., "exercise," "commute").

例: Yes, bicycles are quite popular in my country. Many people ride them for exercise or to lose weight, and others use bikes for short commutes and recreational cycling on weekends.

× Yes, since I've been seeing a lot of people who who ride bicycles to lose weight and also it's their sports.

✓ Yes, I've been seeing a lot of people who ride bicycles to lose weight, and it's also a sport for them.

The original sentence has a repeated word 'who' (typo) and awkward phrasing 'it's their sports.' The phrase 'it's their sports' incorrectly uses plural 'sports' and an awkward possessive structure. Correct to 'it's also a sport for them' to use the singular countable noun 'sport' and clear subject. Also add a comma before 'and' to join clauses. The tense 'I've been seeing' is acceptable, so only fix present participle/phrase and noun number.

× Yes, I did have a bike when I was a child and actually my grandfather was one who taught me how to ride a bicycle.

✓ Yes, I had a bike when I was a child, and my grandfather actually taught me how to ride it.

Using 'did have' is grammatically possible but unnecessary here; simple past 'I had' is more natural. 'Was one who taught me' is wordy; simplify to 'taught me.' Replace 'a bicycle' with 'it' to avoid repetition and improve cohesion. Add a comma before 'and' to separate independent clauses.