Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Use correct verb tenses and simpler, clearer sentences. Start with a direct topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid filler words and repetition.

例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. It was bought by my father when I was nine years old, and I remember riding it around my neighbourhood every weekend.

提案: Answer directly and use clearer reasons with correct vocabulary. Use a linking word (for example, because) and give one specific example or brief personal anecdote. Avoid repetition and correct word choice (bike, not bite).

例: Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country because many children learn to ride them early. For example, I often rode my bike with friends in the park in the evenings, which was a common pastime.

× Yes, I have a bike during when I was child.

✓ Yes, I had a bike when I was a child.

This sentence mixes present simple 'have' with a past time reference 'when I was a child'. Use past simple 'had' to match the past time. Also add the article 'a' before 'child' as standard English: 'a child'. Suggestion: use past tense consistently for past events (e.g., 'I had a bike when I was a child').

× Uh, I remember the bike is bought by my dad during when I was nine years old.

✓ I remember the bike was bought by my dad when I was nine years old.

The passive 'is bought' is present simple passive but the speaker refers to a past event. Use past passive 'was bought'. Remove 'during' which is unnecessary with 'when'. Suggestion: for past events use past simple ('was bought') and use 'when' without 'during'.

× I'm not mistaken. And the bike.

✓ I'm not mistaken, and I still remember the bike well.

'And the bike.' is a fragment lacking a verb; combine with the previous sentence or expand to a full sentence. The suggested correction provides a complete thought. Suggestion: avoid sentence fragments by ensuring each sentence has a subject and verb.

× Yes, I think bikes are quite popular in my country because most of the people during their childhood will have a bite and I still remember I used I used I ride the bike with my friends to go around, travel around the park when it was evening and

✓ Yes, I think bikes are quite popular in my country because most people have a bike during their childhood, and I still remember I used to ride a bike with my friends to go around the park in the evening.

Multiple errors: 'most of the people during their childhood will have a bite' has wrong modal 'will' and wrong noun 'bite' instead of 'bike'. Use simple present 'have' or general present 'have' to state general truths, but here 'during their childhood' works with 'have' or better 'have a bike during their childhood'. The phrase 'I used I used I ride' is repetitive and incorrect; use 'I used to ride' to express habitual past action. 'to go around, travel around the park when it was evening and' is incomplete and awkward; revise to 'to go around the park in the evening.' Suggestions: watch for word choice (bite vs bike), use 'used to' for past habits, and keep sentence structure complete and concise.