Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Make your answer grammatically correct, concise, and more natural. Start with a clear topic sentence in past tense, then add one or two supporting details using linking words. Correct verb tenses and pronouns (e.g., "I had" not "I do have"). Avoid redundancy and long clauses without connectors.

例: Yes, I had a bike as a child. In fact, my first bike was a small red one that my dad gave me, and he patiently taught me to ride it in the park every weekend.

提案: Make the answer more concise and use clearer linking words. Use accurate vocabulary (e.g., 'policies' or 'initiatives' instead of 'enforcements') and provide a specific example or reason. Keep it to 2–3 sentences and avoid repeating 'as'.

例: Yes, bikes are quite popular in Australia. The government has introduced cycling-friendly policies and many people choose to cycle to work, especially in cities with dedicated bike lanes.

× Yes, I do have a bike.

✓ Yes, I had a bike.

The question asks about having a bike when you were a child (past). Using present tense 'do have' is incorrect. Use past simple 'had' to match the time frame. Suggestion: match verb tense to the time expression (when you were a child -> past tense).

× When I was a child, I still remember the first bike I have was given by my dad and he was the one who taught me how to ride a bicycle.

✓ When I was a child, I still remember the first bike I had was given to me by my dad, and he was the one who taught me how to ride a bicycle.

Multiple tense and verb form issues: 'I have' should be past 'I had' to match 'When I was a child'; 'was given by my dad' is passive but sounds awkward without 'to me' after 'given' when the recipient is the speaker. Combine clauses with a comma and conjunction for clarity. Suggestion: use past simple consistently and include 'to me' after 'given' when needed.

× Yes, as I'm currently living in Australia, bikes are really popular as a form of transportation in my country as the government is promoting sustainability enforcements and people will bike to commute to their workplace in the morning

✓ Yes, as I'm currently living in Australia, bikes are really popular as a form of transportation in my country because the government is promoting sustainability measures and people bike to commute to their workplaces in the morning.

Problems: 'as' used twice makes the sentence repetitive; 'enforcements' is incorrect word choice — use 'measures' or 'policies'; 'people will bike to commute' uses future 'will' unnecessarily for habitual action — use present simple 'bike'; 'workplace' should be plural 'workplaces' when speaking generally. Suggestion: use 'because' for causal link, replace 'enforcements' with 'measures' or 'policies', and use present simple for habitual actions.