Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Make your answer grammatically correct, concise, and natural. Start with a clear topic sentence that directly answers the question, then give one or two specific supporting details. Use correct tense and articles (e.g., “When I was a child, I didn’t have a bike. Later, when I became a teenager, my mother gave me a four-wheeler on my birthday.”). Avoid redundant fillers and keep it within 2–4 sentences.

例: When I was a child, I didn’t have a bike. When I became a teenager, my mother gave me a four-wheeler as a birthday present, and I used it to visit friends and run small errands around my neighborhood.

提案: Answer directly, organize ideas with linking words, and use clearer vocabulary and grammar. Begin with a direct opinion (Yes/No/It depends), then explain with specific reasons and contrast past and present using linking phrases (e.g., “In the past…, but now…”). Correct countable nouns and articles and avoid fillers like “uh” and “umm.”

例: In the past, bikes were considered a luxury in my hometown because only wealthy families could afford them. However, nowadays many more people own motorcycles and small cars, so motor vehicles are more common than traditional bicycles.

× When I was child I don't have any bike, but when I become adolescent my mom gifted me a four Wheeler bike on my birthday.

✓ When I was a child I didn't have any bike, but when I became an adolescent my mom gifted me a four-wheeler bike on my birthday.

Multiple issues: missing article before 'child' and wrong verb tenses and forms. 'When I was a child' requires the article 'a'. The clause refers to the past, so use past simple 'didn't have' instead of 'don't have'. 'Become' should be past 'became' to match past context. 'Four Wheeler' should be hyphenated and lowercased as 'four-wheeler'. Also use 'an adolescent' with the article. Suggestion: ensure consistent past tense for past narratives and include necessary articles and correct adjective forms.

× Uh, when I was a child the bike was very popular in my hometown because only a rich person can a afford the bike.

✓ When I was a child, bikes were very popular in my hometown because only rich people could afford them.

Errors include article and number usage. 'The bike was very popular' is unnatural when speaking generally; use plural 'bikes were'. 'Only a rich person' should be pluralized to 'only rich people' to match general statement. Modal tense should be past 'could' to match 'when I was a child'. 'Can a afford the bike' has word order and article errors; correct to 'could afford them'. Suggestion: use plural nouns and past modal 'could' for general statements about the past, and correct word order for 'afford'.

× But nowadays, uh, there's a lot of umm, bikes and auto car which is more popular than bikes.

✓ But nowadays there are a lot of bikes and auto rickshaws, and autos are more popular than bikes.

Number agreement and word choice errors: 'there's a lot of bikes' should be 'there are a lot of bikes' because 'bikes' is plural. 'Auto car' is not idiomatic; use 'auto' or 'auto rickshaw' or 'cars' depending on meaning. The relative clause 'which is more popular than bikes' must agree in number with its subject; use 'autos are more popular than bikes'. Suggestion: match 'there are' with plural nouns, choose correct vehicle term, and ensure subject-verb agreement in comparative clauses.