Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Make the response more concise and varied in sentence structure. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid repeating simple adjectives and correct minor grammar (e.g., use past tense consistently and avoid mixing present tense).

例: Yes — I had a pink bike with white trim when I was a child. It even had butterfly stickers and stabilizer wheels, so I felt safe riding it. I used to go on short rides with my dad every weekend, which are some of my fondest childhood memories.

提案: Answer directly, then support with two clear, specific reasons using linking words to structure the response. Use varied vocabulary and correct informal phrasing (avoid 'like' as a filler). Keep it within three sentences to be natural and effective.

例: I don't think bikes are as popular now as they used to be. In the past, most children rode bikes for hours and often showed them off, but nowadays many prefer indoor activities such as video games. As a result, fewer children choose cycling for leisure.

× It had butterfly stickers on it, it had four wheels and I would love to go for a ride with it with my dad.

✓ It had butterfly stickers on it, it had four wheels, and I would love to go for a ride on it with my dad.

Comma splice and incorrect preposition: The original combines independent clauses with commas rather than joining with a conjunction and comma; also use 'on' a bike not 'with' a bike when saying go for a ride. Keep past tense consistent; 'would love' can be kept as a habitual past preference but here 'would love to go for a ride on it with my dad' is clearer. Suggestion: separate clauses properly with commas and conjunctions, and use the correct preposition 'on' for riding a bike.

× I don't think right now, but back in time it was more popular when I was a kid.

✓ I don't think so right now, but back in the past it was more popular when I was a kid.

Missing word and awkward expression: Add 'so' after 'I don't think' to complete the negative opinion in present tense. 'Back in time' is unnatural; use 'back in the past' or 'in the past'. Maintain present-tense opinion 'I don't think so right now' and contrast with past 'it was more popular'.

× Every kid had a bike and they would go outside and ride it for hours and they would like show off with a little too but right now kids like to stick with playing video games instead so unfortunately not right now.

✓ Every kid had a bike and they would go outside and ride it for hours and they would like to show off a little too, but right now kids prefer to play video games instead, so unfortunately not anymore.

Pronoun-number and verb choice issues and word order: 'they would like show off with a little too' is ungrammatical. Use 'they would like to show off a little too' or 'they liked to show off a little too'. Also 'stick with playing video games' is awkward; use 'prefer to play video games'. 'Not right now' is repeated; use 'not anymore' for clarity. Ensure pronouns match plural 'kids' and verbs follow correct infinitive 'to show' and 'prefer to play'.