Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Уменьшите повторы и исправьте грамматические ошибки; начните с чётного утверждения, добавьте одно-два уточняющих предложения с логическими связками. Уточните, кто подарил велосипед и опишите коротко эмоции или воспоминание с конкретикой (например, где вы катались).

例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. My mother gave it to me as a birthday present, and I remember riding it every afternoon around our neighborhood park. I was very excited because it made me feel independent, and I learned to ride without training wheels within a week.

提案: Избегайте лишних повторов и постарайтесь использовать связки для логичности (например, "because", "for example"). Дайте более конкретные причины популярности и приведите один пример, где и когда вы это наблюдаете. Также исправьте произношение/форму глагола в речи при устном ответе ("ride", "riding").

例: Yes, I think bicycles are very popular in my country because they are affordable and convenient for short trips. For example, on my street I see many children riding their bikes after school and adults cycling to the market on weekends. This widespread use makes cycling a common mode of transport in my town.

× When I was when I was a child I had a bike so my mother is Kivid my mother it gave it to me and I was so excited.

✓ When I was a child I had a bike because my mother, Kivid, gave it to me and I was so excited.

The sentence has several structural and verb issues. Remove the repeated phrase 'when I was' to avoid redundancy. 'is Kivid' is wrong here; use commas to add the name as an appositive: 'my mother, Kivid,'. 'my mother it gave it to me' contains an unnecessary pronoun 'it' and incorrect word order; use simple past 'gave' for a completed action. Overall, simplify the sentence into a single clear clause. Suggestion: keep subject-verb-object order and avoid repeated words.'

× I think bikes so popular is so popular in my country because every child has a bike on my street every day I'm seeing little boys and girls who raid about

✓ I think bikes are very popular in my country because every child has a bike; on my street I see little boys and girls riding about every day.

The original uses wrong tense and word order. Use present simple 'are' for general truths ('bikes are very popular'). 'So popular is so popular' is repetitive; use 'very popular'. Replace progressive 'I'm seeing' with simple present 'I see' for habitual actions. 'Raid about' is a spelling and word choice error; correct verb is 'ride' and use 'riding about'. Also split into clauses for clarity and use a semicolon or period.'